Poor Nosey the Cat is battling everyone's wintertime nemesis—Static Electricity— and losing. Watch as he shuffles around, trying to shed the balloon stuck to his fur.

Hisham Talaat Mustafa, a billionaire Egyptian real estate tycoon, was sentenced to death last year for paying a hit man to murder his Lebanese pop star girlfriend, Suzanne Tamim. Luckily, someone's remembered that he's a billionaire. Let that man go!

Baylor's Britney Griner is blessed with the ability to dunk in other girl's faces, but cursed because she punches those faces. Since this behavior isn't condoned, this newscast will only replay the punch three times from two different angles.

This TV set is going to get complicated, since both his girlfriend and boytoy are co-stars of his. The set of this photo shoot was even worse, when the high-wattage celeb kept smoking meth. Just another day at the office.

A little boy tries to present flowers to the young performers at a piano recital in Japan. When his flowers are ignored, he throws himself to the ground.

Tabloid sex columnist Andrea Peyser has just about had it with people going out and purposely committing crimes in order to go to jail and be able to purchase affordable Pop-Tarts. Wise up, taxpayers.

[Adam Lambert at gay Mardi Gras in Sydney, AU; image via Splash]

A tipster sends this dramatic action photo of International Herald Tribune staffers protesting against their penurious overlord NYT Co. for "laying off people and forcing them to go to Hong Kong or quit." Solidaridad! Full internal protest email below!

There's a quickly developing internet rule that forbids oversharing your pet. However, that rule does not apply when they make noises like these.

Can you guess what movie this image comes from? Check back for the answer at 4pm today.

He thought he could call her "heavy" if he said "top," first. Ke$ha makes fun of Britney. Kendra Wilkinson's baby weight gave her postpartum depression. "Jessica Simpson weighs in on fat jokes." Thursday's gossip roundup was teased as a child.

A new study throws every single PSA that relies on shame into jeopardy, because when youth see images of humiliated people covered in their own vomit, they don't see warnings. They see inspiration. [AdAge]

Fresh from shopping a TV show with Mark Burnett and flossing her star quality on Leno, Palin took her family to loot Hollywood's pre-Oscars gifting suites "like locusts," according to one traumatized witness.

Tag-related Hulu humor, will it ever cease to be amusing? No. Never. Kiefer Sutherland's TV show of stress, yelling, and enhanced interrogation techniques gets a thumbs down. [via ThePriceofEggsinMalta]

When dangling a child out a window is good: Baby-tossing fire victim explains herself.

Tonight, The Oprah Winfrey Oscar Special graced us with its presence. We knew that it would be full of CELEBRITIEEEEEEES, and we knew that they would interview each other. But we learned some new things, too! Inside, some standout moments.

Elise, the Crying Sorority Girl, became famous for sobbing over a practical joke she played on her Alpha Chi sisters. Tonight, she explained on Tosh.0's Web Redemption she only used the now-famous fire extinguisher because she wanted it to snow.

NPH stars in The Smurfs movie. Rachel McAdams is in the new Woody Allen movie. A woman adapts her own divorce story. De Niro: De Starring opposite Bradley Cooper. The days are growing longer. The Roundup's length is variable.

Not because she's undeserving, but because she doesn't know who she's supposed to ask. So now she's @-tweeting random people and performing the bizarre tasks they tell her she must do.

It seems lately that Stephen Colbert has an answer for everything. On tonight's Colbert Report, he delved into European economics, suggesting how Greece could eliminate its debt problem by pushing it on the rest of the European Union. Video inside.