This morning, Fox News featured a new iPhone app designed to assist illegals with their quest to enter the US by locating safe water sources, monitoring border patrol and inspiring through poetry—all funded by your tax dollars. Cue the outrage!

The Sarah Silverman Program hit a new high last night, featuring drug-fueled parties with all of her imaginary friends! Everyone was there, including Andy Samberg and an imaginary dinosaur with more bumps than just those on his back.

You there, Seacrest! What day is this? Oh I had the most wondrous vision last night. Last night I think I actually cared about this season of American Idol. I felt real feelings. Too bad they were angry feelings.

Leonard Nimoy and William Shatner reading what must be a hilarious issue of Mad in 1967, featuring the first Star Trek parody, "Star Blecch". [The Daily What]

Don Draper.

In 1985, a married 30-year-old man sat in a hot tub with 15-year-old girl who worked for him. They were naked. In 2002, he gave the woman $150,000. Now, the man is the majority leader of the Utah House.

Nothing puts a smile on a child's face like a full grown man dressed as an Afghan Hound frantically trying body-morphing, terror-inducing tricks in the backyard, while simultaneously shilling potato chips (or some strange Japanese bastardization thereon).

In what looks like a bad Proactiv commercial, acoustic guitar plucks away as Jessica Simpson admits to not brushing her teeth. This is met with nervous laughter. She then repeats this fact. Again, more nervous laughter. What is going on?

This guy gets the Worst Roommate Ever award for locking his bug-phobic roommate in the bathroom with fifty crickets.

&emc

Remember the 3DO? Or the Power Glove? It's easy to forget that the lineage of today's Playstations and Xboxes is filled with so many odd mutants never fit for mass consumption. Here's a look into the awkward, gawky past.

This amazing video demonstrates the process of making a book-cover through the use of Photoshop, and the careful creation of a visual narrative through digital decoupage.

In a lovely meadow, it rained and rained til the water flooded the lovely meadow. The tiny fish found themselves swimming through the freshly bloomed flowers on the tree branches and under the wooden benches lining the footpaths.

Google's CEO went to Abu Dhabi this week and preached. He sermonized about Google's exceptional virtue — its indifference to profit and supreme trustworthiness. His speech should have been shocking. Except that delusional self-righteousness is now routine at Google.

On this rainy Friday we bring you news of beautiful, sunshiny Hollywood. A film gets a re-release, Grey's Anatomy's brightest star may be supernova'ing, and another young star gets a notch in her belt. Yay showbiz!

Meet the vervet monkeys of St. Kitts! They're a primate posse of beachcombers whose main perogative is to steal your Margarita. After extensive research, Scientists have discovered parallels between the drinking habits of humans and these miniature boozers.

President Obama is delaying his trip to Asia because Congress can't pass Health Care Reform.

Her husband still doesn't know about the drugs! Everyone knows about this actress' drinking problem, especially when she publicly "performs." This male actor is just jonesing for sex with underage girls. Might as well face it, we're addicted to gossip.

In America, it's very formulaic: pitcher beans batter, batter charges pitcher, benches clear, and serious physical altercations are usually avoided. Not in Cuba! In Cuba, the pitcher runs for dear life as the batter maniacally chases after him.

Everyone has an active imagination as a kid, but no one ever understands them. Wouldn't it have been great to have someone illustrate our ridiculous ideas?