JP Morgan's mortgage chief David Lowman yesterday told Rep. Barney Frank that he wanted people who were concerned about home foreclosures to "come to me." He had no idea he would be chased off Capitol Hill by an angry mob.

New York lighting designer Alejandro Bulaevsky was found dead in his downtown apartment handcuffed, wearing a gas mask and latex suit. Police also found "several sadomasochistic contraptions" and steroids at the scene. Neighbors say he was a "party guy."

She says he's a psycho rapist who kidnapped her. He says she's a lying bitch and he wants a refund, but he still loves her and maybe wants her back. Meet Manohara and Prince Fakhry — Southeast Asian media sensations.

The President has learned a lot in Washington. But perhaps most impressive is his gift for the age-old DC tradition of political backslapping. Here is NYT photographer Luke Sharrett's time-lapse slideshow of Obama greeting 46 moochy foreign delegates. [NYT, Getty]

Tonight, Jon Stewart overviewed the media's reaction to a report that many poor households don't pay federal income tax before comparing it to the non-reaction over the fact that Exxon Mobil also doesn't pay. Inside, video of Stewart's magnificent juxtaposition.

At least 300 people are dead after a 7.1 earthquake hit China's earthquake-prone Qinghai Province.

Scientists now say that frequent spanking can lead to aggressive behavior in children, so if you want Americans to continue running the world, spank away. As the Bible says: Spare the rod, create a weak, effeminate communist. [Time]

Wondering why Violent J and Shaggy 2 Dope, the clown-faced gentlemen who comprise "The Insane Clown Posse" are rapping about "miracles" like the Niagara falls, pyramids, and "fuckin' magnets" in their odd, internet-famous new video? Wonder no more!

Some merry japester has painted curses on the Pope's Bavarian birthplace! It's already been painted over, though. The police won't reveal what it said (probably, "fuck the Pope," in German), or whether it was Jews or gays.

Thought tickling someone "till he couldn't breathe" was weird? Turns out Eric Massa had to be removed from a DC bar when he wouldn't stop making "inappropriate comments." Oh, and he hit on the bartender at a marine's funeral. Salty!

It's on: Andrew "Raw Ross" Sorkin released his "Hit 'Em Up" after public humiliation at the hands of Paul "Thugman" Krugman. Sorkin's response gets beef points for snidely calling Paulie K. "Professor Krugman," but loses some for being wrong.

Last week, Wikileaks tweeted that Robert Gates was a "liar". Gates wasn't about to take this sitting down. Today, he slammed Wikileaks while standing aboard a U.S. military aircraft, like a real man.

Maybe you can somehow forgive bankers for destroying our economy. But the lyrics of this rap, performed at a 2006 Washington Mutual "President's Club Dinner" in Hawaii, are unforgivable. They were revealed at a very awkward Senate hearing today.

Actress Michelle Rodriguez is hosting a party for GO Magazine. It's a lesbian magazine. (via)

Starting Tuesday, employed residents of New York City homeless shelters will be charged rent. A family of three making $25,000/year will have to pay $926/month. The worst part: Mike Bloomberg is your new landlord. Take that, homeless people! [NYDN]

G4 network alumni and host of 'Web Soup' Chris Hardwick, sometimes lends his comical expertise to Chelsea Lately's roundtable panel. Here, Hardwick discusses annoying people on twitter and the word "retarded."

Last week's episode was kinda disappointing since Georgie gets caught by the Visitors when he tries to save Ryan, who infiltrated the V ship to plant a secret message in Anna's message to the people of Earth.

Kevin Pollak shared a Christopher Walken quote; Google's CEO was deemed horribly awesome; and Erin Biba's bank has changed this time, he swears. The Twitterati reveled in dysfunction.

Meddling college students from California State University, Stanislaus dug the hospitality rider for Sarah Palin's upcoming speech at the college out of the trash. Good job, students! Now we learn Sarah Palin likes to drink America's milkshake with bendable straws.

Just last summer the Huffington Post was taking flack for barely paying any of its writers. Now a spokesman claims it is paying 70 full-time journalists. Seriously?