Pope Benedict may have ignored warnings about pedophiles and doddered while Rome perved, but he's nowhere near the worst pope ever. Here, via history writer Tony Perrottet, we round up the Vatican's greatest villains – syphilis, hookers and all.

After considering the idea, the mayor decided: "his satire is probably something that we didn't feel suited our small-town atmosphere." They also refused to change the pronunciation of their town's name from cull-bert to coal-bear. Spoilsports. [Augusta Chronicle, The Nation]

Post ombudsman Andrew Alexander makes a the case for the continued flourishing of the paper edition of the Washington Post today. He outlines a few plans to increase the money coming in.

The Olsen twins have sworn off partying. Lindsay Lohan throws a drink at a hockey player. Claudia Schiffer gives birth. Is Justin Bieber dating Miley Cyrus? Shaq attack! Sunday's Gossip Roundup is no junk shot.

Some of the recent financial crisis was blamed on the reckless culture of gambling on Wall Street. The LA Times reports today that they are now literally hiring people with few qualifications beyond a love of poker.

Everyone's favorite overweight heroin addict, Artie Lange, discusses his time in Afghanistan and his experience with one brave soldier in particular.

Studies and conventional wisdom tell us that the suburbs are the new slums. But that is not stopping developers from building thousands of brand new houses—with elevators!—among the empty shells of foreclosed suburban homes. And people are buying.

So far it's not as bad as last time — according to the BBC a smaller number of airports, mainly in Spain and Italy, have been affected. But we have clearly angered the Gods and must expect more. Now is the perfect time to buy that trans-Atlantic cruiseliner you've had your eye on.

Last month, Donny Deutsch called Keith Olbermann 'angry' during his week-long stint as an MSNBC anchor. This enraged Olbermann, and MSNBC suits cut Deutsch's gig short. Today, Deutsch gave a commencement speech at Syracuse. He's still a little upset.

The media isn't just in bed with Barack Obama. They're also in a tiny, vacuum-powered hovercraft with him. Watch, as Obama makes Times political reporter Sheryl Gay Stolberg ride a funny little hovercraft in Buffalo, NY.

Juan-Carlos Cruz, report CNN, used to host Calorie Commando on the Food Network. He's now "accused of plotting to hire homeless people to carry out a murder," according to police in California.

We are not entirely ruling out the possibility this is an elaborate PR exercise — but Conrad Murray, the doctor accused of giving Michael Jackson a lethal dose of anaesthetic, apparently treated a woman aboard a US Airways jet. [AP]

Hey, Did you guys know there's a French version of Slate at www.Slate.fr There totally is! Our French is rusty so we cannot really read the stories on the site. But we can make up our own!

While Mark Sanford rekindles his Argentine love affair, his wife, Jenny, is palling around with Sarah Palin. They stumped together for Tea Party-backed South Carolina gubernatorial candidate Nikki Haley yesterday. Almost makes Mark seem like the good guy here. [AP]

Flying from London to New York, Peter Frank and boyfriend Michael Bailey witnessed two Courtney Love meltdowns. They wrote about it on their Facebook walls. Four days later, the Post's Cindy Adams ripped them off verbatim.

The guitarist for the German emo band Tokio Hotel just overdosed on Viagra! What happens when you pop too many of the diamond-cut erection-makers? Sanjay Gupta didn't return our calls, so let's check Google.

James Fallows has a truly excellent analysis of why journalism is not dying (just paper and ink) and how Google sees the industry changing. Read it if you're bored with the usual doom and gloom. [Atlantic]

I didn't plan to pick a fight with Steve Jobs last night. It just sort of happened: An iPad advertisement ticked me off; I sent the Apple CEO an angry email; he told me about "freedom from porn."

A man was found at the bottom of a 3ft-by-3ft shaft building shaft in Williamsburg last night, having fallen 60 feet. He was apparently trying to jump between sections of the roof while at a rooftop party.

BP, those cheeky scamps, are always coming up with madcap ways to quell that oil spill. Today's effort involved threading a tube into the leaking well and just, like, SUCKING, the oil up to the surface. It failed. [AP]