Christian Lorentzen was hired by the New York Observer as senior editor last week. Before that, he was a senior editor at Harper's Magazine. But we hear he lost his last job following a sexual harassment incident.

Regis can't figure out what in the world is going on Lost. Jimmy Kimmel, Lost-megafan, hammers out the plotline in terms Regis can understand: Gelman's the Smoke Monster, Kathie Lee Gifford is Jacob, and Sawyer's just a modern-day Don Rickles.

Want to see a jerk-off NASCAR fan with a racist t-shirt? Here you go.

NBC's annoying decision to move Parks & Recreation to mid-season, an animated version of Napoleon Dynamite is coming to Fox, Conan O'Brien's new show has found a home, George Lucas writes to the Lost creators, and NPH on Glee.

Ohhh hey ladies! The internet has tracked down nine clips from the upcoming Sex and the City 2: Chamber of Secretions. And they are juicy! (Secretions juicy!) Someone's getting married, fabulously.

[And everyone thought Michelle Rodriguez was Lost's token lesbian. Photographic investigation of Evangeline Lilly kissing a lady on the red carpet at Cannes reveals a brief moment of contemplation before luscious lady osculation. Images: Splash]

TONIGHT: We've got four season finales, as Gossip Girl, House, Castle and One Tree Hill wrap up, plus new episodes of Chuck, How I Met Your Mother, Nurse Jackie, and Dancing with the Stars.

Google co-founder Sergey Brin couldn't make it to a science gala this past weekend, so he went as a robot he could control remotely. It's a little creepy and a little awesome.

Obama's illegal immigrant auntie—who once faced deportation—has been granted asylum.

The Rolling Stones' Keith Richards talked to The Today Show's Matt Lauer about the recording of their album Exile on Main St. He claims to have been sober during the sessions—like anyone is going to believe that.

Congratulations to Suzy Q and A for being the first person to answer today's Freeze Frame. Click through for the answer.

Today at Gawker.TV, Family Guy travels to Washington D.C., a poll about which Alec Baldwin SNL sketch was best, Cleveland's Angels, timelapse of Eyjafjallajökull erupting, and more news anchors giggling about penises. When will it end?

Throw that raggedy-ass couch out on the curb and buy yourself some nearly-adult furniture. Just fill out this survey, email the last question to contests@gawker.com, and you will be entered to win a $150 gift card to the one-and-only Ikea! [Rules]

The Way We Live Now: Looking at the big picture. It lifts our battered spirits to think not just of our own poor circumstances, but of the bigger losses suffered by Jay-Z, and other rich folks. It's economics, or something.

With its ratings in the toilet and prime time roster trashed by the failed Jay Leno experiment, the upcoming television season is make-or-break for NBC. Based on the trailers for the shows it has coming up, is there any hope?

We were really hoping that this is some kind of elaborate prank, but all evidence is pointing to the fact that this really is Chris Klein's audition for a role in Mamma Mia!

Spanish mathematician Jose-Manuel Rey has calculated the "second thermodynamic law for sentimental interaction" and charted the trajectory of "sentimental equilibrium." Just like a relationship that is falling apart, it is as complicated as it is inscrutable.

Balloon Boy's parents are finally getting their balloon back. The county sheriff had it, apparently.

A federal appeals court ruled you can't be convicted of bank robbery based on your MySpace profile, even when your username is "Trigga" and has images of falling $100 bills and you holding a handgun. Make it rain freedom, baby.

In your familial Monday media column: Theo Wenner gets himself a magazine job, headlines that sell, the most powerful woman in newspapers, teevee people speak to college kids about teevee things, and newspapers muddle about.