Would you eat a cheeseburger from a vending machine? What if that cheeseburger was endorsed by NASCAR legend Dale Earnhardt Jr.? Fret not: Such a product—the Dale Jr. cheeseburger—will soon be available, from vending machines across the land!

Colombian beauty queen Angie Sanclamente Valencia was arrested in today Argentina for running a smuggling ring wherein she recruited other models to deliver drugs via commercial flights. The Argentine press dubbed her "Narco Queen." And, well, boobs, drugs, etc.[BBC]

You know what someone should do something about? All those Muslims who are desperate to escape their religion but just haven't found the courage to do it because Islam is so violent. Luckily this blogger woman will save the day!

The ninth season (I know, right?) of American Idol just wrapped up, and overall, it was a pretty good show. The highlight, though, was the return of Paula Abdul, who semi-awkwardly paid tribute to departing judge Simon Cowell. Videos inside.

While the world is glued to the live cam, BP COO Doug Suttles said half an hour ago that only drilling mud—not oil—is flowing from the well. But that's BP's estimate, so... let's say 10,000 barrels/day? [Reuters]

Dave Chappelle wouldn't go to Sesame Street even if he knew how to get there. Watch as he describes what the most popular cartoon characters are really all about.

Got any plans tonight? Why bother slaving over a hot stove? Order take out and join our commenter live blog of Top Chef Masters instead! Look. Now you have plans.

Marc Lamont Hill is the black Liberal Columbia professor who for some reason is always on The O'Reilly Factor. Tonight's episode made Hill's presence even more puzzling, because Bill O'Reilly told him that he looks like someone who sells drugs.

Coolio Dropped the N-Bomb live on CNN! (When they accidentally played "Fantastic Voyage")

[Julia Gnuse, who appears in the Guinness Book of World Records as the "most tattooed woman," shows off how she got there at BookExpo America today at the Javitz Center. Image via Getty]

A man claims his wife tormented him with Garth Brooks' name: "My wife would leave the house for periods of time indicating she was 'going to meet Garth.' referring to... the country music singer." She couldn't pick someone attractive? [Contactmusic]

It's no secret that Heidi Montag wants to replace Megan Fox in the third installment of Michael Bay's Transformers series, but we didn't know how badly she longed for it until now. Inside, an "audition" video she made for Bay.

It takes several long stares to comprehend that these photos depict rapper 50 Cent, who once looked like this. In the name of his burgeoning acting career, he removed several tattoos and lost 60 lbs. to play a cancer patient.

Bristol Palin spent time with Harper's Bazaar, telling the magazine she's a non-stop work machine. Or at least she is when not clubbing it up in New York, charging $30,000 for a speech, or posing for Harper's Bazaar.

It's time for the season finale of American Idol! Tonight, at 8:00 PM ET on FOX, either Crystal Bowersox or Lee DeWyze will win, Simon Cowell will say farewell, Paula Abdul might show up, and more! Your open thread, inside.

After weeks of anticipation, tonight BP streams the hours-long Top Kill finale online! Will pumping tons of heavy mud into the well halt the flow? Or will our contestants have to come up with another wacky scheme? Watch it here.

Al Qaeda's latest diabolical plot: It's staging an assault on America's eardrums and it's using autotune to do it. A pair of hip-hop jihadis—including Alabama-born convert Omar Hammami—released hot new English-language tracks on a terrorist website this week.

Today we looked at the errors of promoting oneself on email, sparking a commenter to tell us a harrowing tale of a mass email gone wrong.

Apple's market capitalization surpassed Microsoft's today. Only Exxon Mobil is larger, among public U.S. companies.

In 1955, the legendary James Dean had his first major screen role as Cal Trask in East of Eden. Here, he and Paul Newman shoot a screen test for the lead roles of the Trask brothers.