Three New Jersey teenagers were detained for several hours this weekend after they mistakenly knocked on the door of a state trooper who then shot at them as they drove away, the NY Daily News reports.

Ray Tensing, the former University of Cincinnati Police Officer charged with murdering Samuel DuBose, was released from jail Thursday night after posting 10 percent of a $1 million bond, WXIX reports. His next court date is scheduled for August 19.

Police say six people were injured, one of them critically, when an ultra-Orthodox assailant began stabbing attendees of Jerusalem’s annual Gay Pride Parade on Thursday, Haaretz reports.

The only thing crazier than paying $32 (plus water and shoes) to ride an exercise bike in the dark is the way SoulCycle is describing itself to potential investors, now that it’s going public. The word “SOULccolade” makes an appearance.

The death of Cecil the Lion, slain by some bumpkin dentist whose life appears to now be hell, very quickly reached the point of hypothetical comparison, and today we keep moving down the line: eating chicken is “morally worse” than killing Cecil the Lion, says Vox’s Dylan Matthews. Now we must talk about why this is stupid.

Brazil, which I’m sure is a perfectly lovely country, has an overload of naturally occurring resource. That resource, unfortunately, isn’t diamonds or oil—it’s human excrement, which Olympic athletes will have to swim through if they want to win a medal next summer.

New York City, a crowded land sorely in need of housing, is in the midst of its “biggest building boom in a generation,” issuing new residential building permits at a pace not seen for more than 50 years. Soon there could be tens of thousands of new apartments that you can’t afford.

During Donald Trump’s 1992 divorce proceedings, his wife provided a deposition that detailed an upsetting, ugly sexual assault. The episode was recounted in Lost Tycoon, a gossipy biography that’s now out of print—but you can read it right here.

Movie villain James Woods filed a $10 million defamation suit Wednesday against a Twitter user who called him “a cocaine addict,” according to The Hollywood Reporter. The probably-pseudonymous Twitter user, “Abe List,” made the crack July 15 in response to an asinine Woods tweet that called Caitlyn Jenner “Bruce” and hyped up the bogus Planned Parenthood “baby parts” scandal in one foul breath.

AirBnB’s new advertising slogan is “Is Mankind?” Dumb as hell. Give me a break. There are many better slogans courtesy of the Gawker.com staff.

The most hated dentist in America—no small feat, I assure you—has spoken. Sadly, it seems Dr. Walter James Palmer is under the impression that “ignorance of the law” is a viable defense to allegedly illegally hunting Zimbabwe’s most beloved lion.

In a new interview with NPR in anticipation of his 3,000th film about a young woman falling for an old man, Woody Allen talked about why his alleged sexual abuse of his daughter hasn’t affected his movies and the genesis of his marriage to Soon-Yi Previn, the adopted daughter of his ex-partner* Mia Farrow, who first met Allen when she was 10.

With his final episode as host of the Daily Show just a week away, Jon Stewart hit NYC’s Comedy Cellar last night with Louis C.K. and former Daily Show/current Nightly Show producer Rory Albanese and ended up getting onstage for 10 minutes of surprise stand-up.

Forty years ago today, Teamster boss Jimmy Hoffa went out to lunch and disappeared forever. Do you know where he is? If so, tell us. We could use a good story right about now.

Ray Tensing, the University of Cincinnati police officer who killed Sam DuBose during a routine traffic stop on July 19, pleaded not guilty to murder this morning. His bond was set at $1 million.

“Millennials,” a demographic group defined by a slavish devotion to “keeping it real” by purchasing the correct consumer products, are now old enough to be “out there” in the world, “doing their thing.” Instead, they are living at home.

Baby elephant frolics with birds?

According to Politico, former Virginia Governor and future Google search term “Jim Gilmore” filed papers to run for president today, bringing the total number of Republican presidential hopefuls to seven-goddamn-teen.

A single-engine passenger plane carrying two people crashed and caught fire at Milwaukee’s Timmerman Airport Wedndesday evening, the Milwaukee Journal Sentinel reports. The Milwaukee County Department of Transportation has confirmed that both passengers have died.

Television director Jason “Jace” Alexander—not to be confused with Seinfeld star Jason Alexander—was arrested in New York on Wednesday on child pornography charges, CBS New York reports.