Quantifying the outcomes of rumors isn't an exact science. For the purpose of this story, we focused on five types of falsifiable rumors: breakups, pregnancies, marriages, engagements, adoptions, and reconciliations. Within each category, we used our own judgment as follows:

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Oh fucking snap bros, drop everything and rush down to the Borders on Wall Street, where Tucker Max is just finishing a book signing! His new book comes out today! Send pics! Send reviews! Send medication! It's on again! Damn.

1970s Kenny Powers attempts the longest car jump in history in a suped-up Lincoln Continental. Good thing they secured that parachute on that 6000 pound lug-o-metal going 280 mph. That was definitely clutch in making this whole thing (not) successful.

White House chief of staff Rahm Emanuel is all but certain to quit and run for Chicago mayor, possibly this week. Which lucky ducky in Washington will replace Emanuel in this miserable, cynical job? Hopefully some hack!

Lest there be any doubt that the Drudge Report is the Perez Hilton of politics: Today's top story is a two-week-old "demon photo" of Hillary Clinton. The Drudge Report is actually a liberal parody of the conservative blogosphere, right?

OH LAWD is this bad. Like, really, really bad. Here's a video of a girl performing a magic trick—making herself disappear, I suppose. The thing, though, is that she fails. Miserably. Get your Tuesday schadenfreude fix on, inside.

Whether the rich, beautiful youngsters on Gossip Girl are going to Columbia, raping teens, or attending to Fashion's Night Out there's only one thing that matters: power. Who has it, who wants it, and who comes out on top?

How did Mike "The Situation" Sorrentino do on his first "real" performance on Dancing With the Stars? We rounded up all of the best parts for you (because nobody should have to sit through two whole hours of celebrity dancing!)

In your wide-ranging Tuesday media column: HuffPo lashes out at an unpaid former writer, NBC's worth revealed, Reuters wants to be like us, and Jay Rosen tells a story.

With screams that could wake a Confederate soldier, this charming Southern belle getting an upper back tattoo (because lower back tattoos are for Yanks) learned that tattoos hurt. Why I do declare, surprise!

Don't they say dolphins are supposed to be really smart or something? This video features a collision of epic dolphin proportions. This is what the bottlenose dolphin gets for being such a show-off. A majestic fall from grace.

Now that you've decided whether or not Sarah Palin was booed on last night's Dancing with the Stars (watch here), here's another gem: Bristol's Alaska visit with partner Mark Ballas, who mommy was quite smitten with, to say the least.

Jimmy Carter has been hospitalized in Cleveland after experiencing health problems on a flight.

Mike Arrington just confirmed the rumors: He's selling his five-year-old blog company TechCrunch to AOL. And he's sticking around for at least three years to keep running the site.

Barnes & Noble's mustachioed chairman Leonard Riggio defeated Ron Burkle's vigorous battle to wrangle control of the failing bookseller's board. Riggio will now return to supervising the company's descent into nothingness. [WSJ. Pic: AP]

Which former Chelsea Lately guest left the host a message that reads: "I want to f*ck you"? Watch Adam Levine read from Handler's racy Celebrity Guest Book. Apparently, things on the Lately set are just as wild as assumed.

When FOX premiered Lone Star last week, it was met with critical praise and general indifference from the audience. There was immediate talk of cancellation. Was last night's airing of episode two also the last we'll see of the show?

As many as 1,000 people in Mexico may have been buried in a mudslide.

Check the clip to see Katherine Heigl whip out an electric "SmokeStik" cigarette in the middle of her Late show interview. David Letterman gives the device a shot and seems to have a pretty good time with it!