The Chilean miners delved too deeply while underground, and discovered an unexpected someone from pop culture! Rescue workers took pity on the unpleasant person and rescued him anyway. See animated footage of the last person (character) out of the mine!

In your cooling Thursday media column: Roger Ailes has apprentices, newspaper websites are popular, the AP gets rid of its writers, and Jack Shafer defends Joe Nocera.

"Honestly the only person that I trust in this house is Chet," said Mandi, after sleeping with Chet. Let's set the stage and break down what will be Mandi's only story arc of the season, shall we?

Know what today is? Lori Petty's birthday, yes. But also: it's premiere day for the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, the next meat-show to come out of the Bravo dream factory. Just who are these Housewives? Let's find out!

In a hilariously predictable Wall Street Journal column today, Daniel Henninger writes, for real: "It needs to be said. The rescue of the Chilean miners is a smashing victory for free-market capitalism." How can these miners ever adequately thank capitalism?

Angelina Jolie is currently filming her directorial debut in Budapest. Her partner, Brad Pitt, stopped by the set yesterday. They ate a sandwich together. We're not sure exactly what they said, but we think it went something like this.

The second episode of South Park's new season targeted the state that's taken over America's televisions—New Jersey. It was ruthless, featuring less-than-flattering caricatures of Snooki, The Situation, and the cast of The Real Housewives of New Jersey.

Brad: "They totally have paninis at craft services. Paninis. Mmmmmm"

[Photo via Bauer-Griffin]

Daily Profile: Scott Rudin

That's right, it's the "Patron Saint of Shark Jumping" himself, joining this show's cast in only its 10th episode, surely a personal best. And in a self-aware nod to Who's the Boss? — it's guest star Katherine "Mona" Helmond!

Wal-Mart is talking up its plans to build dozens and dozens of (relatively) small grocery stores, as a way to establish a beachhead in areas where it hasn't been able to enter. Like New York City. What will that mean?

In a Jerry Maguire moment of clarity, Lee Abrams, a man considered a pioneer by some and idiot by others, composed a company-wide memo with links to this Onion video. Suffice it to say, it didn't go over well. [NSFW]

McDonald's locations in Hong Kong are now promoting in-house wedding ceremonies. Ronald McDonald can officiate, there's a special menu for guests, and even wedding cakes made out of either hamburgers or apple pies. That sounds friggin' delicious, no? [Photo via]

Bruce Willis' recent streak of interviews promoting his new movie Red have—simply put—been very weird. We're unsure if he's got emotional distress in his life or if he's just pulling a "Joaquin Phoenix." Evidence inside.

[Ashlee Simpson in New York. Photo via Splash]

Jay Leno, consumer reports expert, investigates the top products for pet owners who never plan to marry. Top on his list: a doggie high chair, so that all the single ladies have someone to cry to over lasagna.

Gawker.TV Trivia, a daily question & answer game that tests your knowledge of television—past and present. Do you think you that you've got it? The answer to today's question, inside.

Many (four) years ago, we Americans had a vice president, Dick Cheney, who shot an old man in the face. On a hunting trip. And today that victim, Harry Whittington, is profiled in the newspaper! How's he doing?

Indian tycoon Mukesh Ambani is about to move into his new house, the world's largest: a 27-story skyscraper in Mumbai. It has three helipads, a parking garage and 600 staff members. It's worth £630 million, or about $9 bajillion.

The finance industry's idea of public outreach: displaying a $2 million golden Monopoly set.