[This photographer taking snaps of two strippers at the annual Venus Erotic Fair in Berlin is probably having the best day of his professional life. A less safe-for-work photo inside.]

Hayden and Sean filmed a "Save The Date" video so fantastic that it would take an moron to RSVP "no" to the wedding. Check out this invite (edited to look like the "Yankee Review" scene from Rushmore) after the jump.

A new survey finds most people think hand sanitizer works for an hour or more. Actually, it only protects for two minutes. "The best germicidal thing you can do is wash with soap and water," says a doc. [NYDN]

There was a Twilight book-burning in Portland recently. Self-proclaimed "real vampires" rail against Stephanie Meyer for misrepresenting vampires. Apparently, vampires don't look like somebody "who is getting ready to open for The Cure." Hopefully they file a suit for libel.

Based on this video, it is safe to assume that Beck's parents not only deprived him of juice boxes, but also forced him to watch PBS 24/7. Watch him spill juice on himself and defame PBS simultaneously.

A slick new ad from Citizens Against Government Waste points out where America's big spending ways are leading us: a dystopian near-future where evil Chinese professors gloat about China's domination over America.

Polls show California's Proposition 19 losing support and possibly failing. But dweeb hero Nate Silver says pollsters might be rashly excluding stoners as "likely voters" for the pot legalization measure. They'll get around to voting. Like, almost definitely.

According to Terriers producer Shawn Ryan in an interview from Monday's "Firewall & Iceberg" podcast, the show is "ratings-challenged," and "I've heard from a lot of people who thought it was a reality show about dog fighting..."

A group of protesters stood behind BBC political editor Nick Robinson last night, waving an anti-war sign behind his head. Mad that they ruined his shot, he grabbed their sign, tore it apart, and stomped on it. On camera.

Why read the Bill Bryson book when you can spend the next three minutes watching someone's art course final project? Made from 2100 (corners) of pages, this sketch animation walks you through everything from the big bang to airplanes.

So today we talked about the firing of Juan Williams. Is he a bigot for worrying that everyone in "Muslim garb" could be a terrorist? Or is he just being realistic? That's what one commenter argued today.

Your daily look into the twitterific lives of our favorite celebs

Over one year after Michael Jackson's death, ex-wife Lisa Marie Presley opened up to Oprah for the first time in an exclusive interview today. This clip is just a taste of a candid, eye-opening interview.

Slate's prudish advice columnist Dear Prudence received a question from a woman dating a man with a tiny, tiny penis. Prudence's response today focuses on love and relationships, but skimps on the sex. We'll get down to the itty-bitty nitty-gritty.

In response to Juan Williams' firing from NPR over dumb comments about Muslims, Fox News has expanded his contributing role at its network into a regular one — replete with a whopping three-year, $2 million contract.

President Obama will meet one on one with Apple CEO Steve Jobs this evening, reports Business Insider, before speaking at a fundraiser at Googler Marissa Mayer's house in Palo Alto. Try calling the cops on Mayer now, neighbors.

Once you're spoiled by the internet, doing things the old fashioned way makes you want to stand on your chair and yell through the phone. That's what the Dunphys tried to go through this week, with unsuccessful results.

Hollywood, the most original dream factory in the world, is apparently remaking Paul Verhoeven's marvelous 1990 sci-fi adventure Total Recall, possibly with Colin Farrell in the Arnold Schwarzenegger "Quaiiiddd!!" role. Aw, his face won't look as funny all bulged out.

This Australian Calvin Klein billboard is being pulled after the Advertising Standards Bureau there ruled that it is "suggestive of violence and rape" and "demeaning to women," as well as men. Yea, well, so is the fashion industry. [via Adfreak]

A retreat into the woods inspires drunken antics involving slingshots and beer cans, which of course leads to hilarious (but not serious) injuries. You can even watch it happen in slow motion!