The Way We Live Now: less like a rich mom and more like a poor mom. Less like a dream realized and more like a dream deferred. Less like Jesus. More like a renegade tax man, out for justice.

We finally got our copy of Canadian soul chanteuse Justin Bieber's new autobiography First Step 2 Forever, and we are so excited to share it with you! Let's ease into the material with some textual pictures, shall we?

Conspiracy theorists, unite! Courtesy George Clarke, here's some footage—slowed down Zapruder-style—of Charlie Chaplin's 1928 film, The Circus that appears to show a woman walking down the street... while talking on a cell phone. Buh? Watch for yourself—and decide—inside.

[Bristol Palin carries coffee and water to a rehearsal for Dancing with the Stars. Image via Splash.]

It was Christmas for the contestants of the Amazing Race, but that didn't mean a Douglas Fir and a yule log. Nope, they got lamb's head. The best part, however, was how they got through the experience of eating it.

Parts of Indonesia have been struck by a magnitude 7.5 earthquake. No casualties reported yet.

TONIGHT: We've got the season premiere of In Treatment and the season finale of Thintervention, plus new episodes of Lie to Me, The Real Housewives of Atlanta, The Event, Mike & Molly, Chase, Hawaii Five-0, DWTS, HIMYM, Chuck, and more!

Asked by CNN about his company photographing people's homes for its "Street View" feature, Eric Schmidt said, "we drive exactly once. So you can just move, right?" When will Google's CEO stop saying frightening things awkwardly?

Reggie Bush did not take the news that Kim's got a new man serenely. When he texts her vitriolic rants about not putting a ring on it, Kim enlists her mom and bff to craft the perfect mature response.

Frank Caprio, a Democrat, is in a tight three-way race for governor of Rhode Island. A White House endorsement could help! But after the White House made clear that Barack Obama wouldn't endorse anyone, Caprio told him to "shove it."

Lyss Stern is a "mommy blogger" and founder of mom-centric events company Divalysscious Moms. With those journalistic credentials, you may be shocked to learn she's accused of trying to trade a "puff piece" for $45,000 in dental work.

Congratulations to Chocolate-Wafer for being the first person to answer today's Freeze Frame. Click through for the answer.

A Glenn Beck expert was on Charlie Rose to talk about his book, which you won't read. Here is everything you might have gained from reading Tears of a Clown: Glenn Beck and the Teabagging of America. Watch inside.

Early this morning, 21 year-old Christopher Jusko was stabbed to death in his East Seventh Street apartment in Manhattan. He died on the sidewalk in front of his building. Below is a photo of the aftermath. Warning: It's very graphic.

According to Senate minority leader Mitch McConnell, "The single most important thing that we," the Republicans hoping to retake Congress, "want to achieve is for President Obama to be a one-term president." Mitch! You're supposed to say "fix the economy."

Whitney Port commented on the fate of her faux-show The City today: "As of right now it doesn't really look like we're doing it anymore." MTV's previously denied cancellation rumors. If they kill it, can we still hate Olivia Palermo?

Sarah Palin was in Phoenix for a Tea Party rally on Friday, where she had the wonderful opportunity to meet Maricopa County's legally questionable, self-promoting celebrity sheriff, Joe Arpaio. And apparently he gave her pink underwear.

No one really knows, so one director, and possibly one actress, are endeavoring to find out. Also today: NBC orders two dubious sounding pilots, Matthew Weiner has a casting change for his first movie, and trouble in New Zealand.

The Financial Times' John Gapper weighs in with a new and elegant solution to the riddle that is deadbeat photographer Annie Leibovitz's descent into insolvency: Rich art collectors have no interest in buying her photographs, because they're not that good.

Gregory Isaacs, the reggae star who recorded more than 500 (!) albums over a 40-year career, is dead at the age of 59, from lung cancer. Nobody, but nobody, sang smoother. A few jams, below.