Meet "The Monster", an eight hundred horsepower thirty ton industrial shredder that can rip apart everything from a full size refrigerator to a fold out couch in seconds.

[Beyoncé and Mary J Blige flank a silver alien, who crashed to Earth and landed on a red carpet in New York, asking to be taken to our leader. We think she meant Jay-Z. Image via Getty]

Last night on How I Met Your Mother, the gang celebrated Thanksgiving with a few extra friends: Lost's Jorge Garcia, Jennifer Morrison, and a mysterious "Wang Guy." There were Lost references! Ferris Bueller references! The mysterious curse of the Blitz!

Baby radiation! Benadryl doom! AIDS pill! Boomer sex! Large 'n lovely! Birth defects! Attitude gratitude! Youth strength! Salt intake! It's your Tuesday Health Watch, where we watch your health—with unrestrained glee, and that's not a teevee show!

Park51, the proposed Islamic community center and mosque in downtown Manhattan, has applied for federally-funded grants, prompting shrill cries that the "Ground Zero mosque" is looking for a taxpayer handout.

On last night's Chuck, Sarah Walker was on a mission to save her man in the jungles of Thailand, and she had to kick a lot of butt to get the job done. Inside, a compilation of her fight scenes.

There's a lobby underway to get witchy failed Tea Party Senate candidate Christine O'Donnell cast on your mother's favorite show, Dancing with the Stars. Currently that lobby consists of only Sarah Palin. Shockingly, we agree with Sarah on this one.

The creators of the "dougie" dance were on Wendy Williams today to teach her the famed dance. She learns it alright, and in an attempt to look sexy ends up looking particularly terrifying.

This morning on Regis & Kelly, Regis brought up the topic of baby boomers (aged 45 - 65) being dissatisfied with sex. But Regis, being 128, reminded us that he does not fit in that age category. "Yeaaaah!!"

Since yesterday, you people have donated more than $1,800 to debt-besieged college grad Kelli Space.

Flight-ditching flight attendant Steven Slater is sharing his advice on how to behave like a civilized adult while traveling: "We're more likely to dote on refined customers than we are the T-shirt and flip-flop crowd." Can't argue with that.

Check out this "uncensored" interview with Daniel Radcliffe where he shares the details of his everyday life: fighting off evil demons, getting "broom-burn" and playing Quidditch. If this interview is to be believed, he thinks he's actually Harry Potter.

Sick of all this gays in the military jibber-jabber? Well, rest easy, because the whole controversy has been settled on The Daily Caller. The solution? Lesbians are totally fine in the military, but gay men (hereafter "gays") are absolutely not.

The cargo area of Boston's Logan Airport has been evacuated pending the investigation of a "suspicious item."

French President Nicolas Sarkozy doesn't think much of allegations that he helped fund a political campaign with kickbacks from a Pakistani arms deal. During an off-the-record briefing with journalists, he went nuts, calling them "pedophiles." Unsurprisingly, this didn't stay off-the-record.

On Fashion Police the gang played "Starlet or Streetwalker." The image was a woman clad in black with ripped leggings. Surprise! It's Cher. Click through to see if the Fashion Police thought she was a star or a hooker.

Last year we had so much fun hearing your accounts of holidays gone horribly awry, we decided to do it again. Like grandma getting drunk and cursing you out, it's a new Thanksgiving tradition!

In your traditional Tuesday media column: a new racket for News Corp, a new editor at Men's Journal, a new features editor at the NY Daily News, a new name for Medill J-school

Remember when Laura Ingraham and very serious journalist, Gretchen Carlson, had a spastic dance-off on national television last month? Well, now Fox & Friends aired a video with Laura and Gretchen's faces superimposed onto, for some reason, break-dancing elves.

Aw, moose turds. As expected, Sarah Palin's Alaska, the former governor's TLC reality show, dropped 40% in the ratings from week one to week two. It still nabbed 3 million viewers on Sunday, good for cable, but it's no mega-hit.