Today in rich people things: Here is a Manhattan couple selling their Chelsea townhouse that has a full-sized swimming pool in the living room. Yes, that's right. They have their own swimming pool that's probably larger than your whole apartment.
Here's a new, longer trailer for the Paul Rudd comedy Our Idiot Brother. This one has a lot more Emotion on display, as we see Paul Rudd's (occasionally) lovable fuckup inadvertently teaching his disapproving sisters (Elizabeth Banks, Zooey Deschanel, and Emily Mortimer) life lessons. Looks good, right?
Hot air balloons are pretty, right? Well, what if they have a man hanging from the basket suspended by only two hooks placed in his back? Not so cute now, huh?
It's probably wildly overvalued, so don't buy the stock. But if you're a happy Pandora customer, you can cheer the news that the magical online radio service's IPO went well today. Three billion dollars well.
A new science study has proven that babies, like teenage girls who just got back from visiting their cousins in Europe, really love Picasso.
Do you know what is causing climate change, destroying rainforests, and drowning polar bears? Yes, it's your DVR! OK, it's not that bad, but did you know that DVRs in this great nation of ours use as much electricity as the entire state of Maryland?
Life as an American attorney these days is little more than a steady progression of more and more degrading news stories about the ever-declining status of your job, and, by extension, the rapid downward spiral of your worth as a human being. When we last checked in on the unfortunate underemployed would-be litigators, they were getting their own formerly outsourced jobs backsourced to them, at a fraction of the pay.
What is Pakistan doing with the $2 billion in military aid we gave it last year, and the additional $2 billion we'll be spending on it over the next five years? Oh, just arresting people who helped the CIA kill Osama bin Laden, like the soldier who secretly recorded the license plate numbers of cars entering his Abbottabad compound. I guess we need to give them more money.
Is Catholic-filled Catholic University a "den of sin," infested with more STDs than your average koala bear? One can scarcely draw any other conclusion, based on the fact that the school's president now believes he must forcefully segregate students of opposite genders from one another, lest all this hot, hot sexxx continue unabated.
What could be more delightful than spending a year as Hollywood rage-blogger Nikki Finke's boss? Reading the open love-letter she penned you on your way out.
Natalie Portman had a son last night, officially making her the world's hottest mother. Also today: A scary plot to murder the singer Joss Stone, Nicolas Cage owes us a house, and lots of royal couple news.
This singer isn't just cheating on his wife, he's getting naughty with one of his daughter's good buddies. Slumber parties must be a blast! This acting couple puts on disguises and donates time to charity. How disgustingly wholesome!
Traditionally, job titles at PR firms work like this: the lowliest slaves who are forced to cold-call angry reporters and write unread press releases all day are called "account executives," and everyone else is a "VP" of one sort or another, whether or not they are actually in charge of anything, or competent.
The Southern Baptist church is the second-biggest church in America (after Catholics), and the biggest church of all down South. Meaning that it also has thoroughly racist roots! And now, they're ready to put a black guy in charge. *Tear.*
The regime of Syrian president Bashar al-Assad is celebrating the wholesale slaughter of civilians by throwing a kick ass street party, "Raise with us the Biggest Syrian Flag" today in Damascus. They've unveiled a huge flag just for the event: 2,300 meters long and 18 meters wide and sewn with the blood, sweat and determination of pro-Assad heroes. Luckily, state-run Syrian Arab News Agency had a "correspondent" on the scene, where emotions were running high:
