You may have noticed that your baby is starting to exhibit personal preferences. Like any other self-involved parent, you probably assumed that your carefully cultivated aesthetic choices would transfer directly to your offspring via DNA. What if it didn't? [Jezebel]

As his congresswoman wife Michele continues to make progress in her terrifying death march toward Washington, Marcus Bachmann has become a focus of the ever-curious media, and the things we've found out about him have been a bit unsettling, like the fact that he runs one of those pray-the-gay-away facilities.

Today is an exciting day, because we've discovered that there is a silver lining to these excruciating debt ceiling negotiations that can serve as a palliative for our fatalist misery and depression.

Ashton Kutcher tried to play king of the cool kids at Allen & Co.'s Sun Valley schmoozefest, convening an afterparty of boy wonder internet moguls. Too bad he only got tech's D-list to show up.

We're not going to actually show you five million 4chan posts, since we and all of you would likely be sent to prison for a long time. But here's a word cloud generated from 5,576,095 posts. (Click on the photo above to enlarge.)

In your treacly Tuesday media column: News Corp stock is a buy sell, Dan Doctoroff is Bloomberg's new CEO, the economy barely beats Casey Anthony, magazine ad pages are flat, and Time Out Boston folds.

Two days after his birthday bash, Julian Assange took his silver locks to court again today, in the latest round of his fight to keep from being extradited to Sweden to face rape and sexual assault allegations, which he says are baseless.

In his latest film, Tabloid, documentary filmmaker Errol Morris revisits a bizarre story that dominated the British rags 30 years ago. It was a simpler time. Voicemail hadn't yet been invented, so there was nothing to hack. Our heroine, Joyce McKinney, was a busty former Miss Wyoming with an I.Q. of 168. Living then in L.A., McKinney hired a pilot, a private detective, and several musclebound bodyguards, and set off to England to rescue the runaway fiance she was convinced had been brainwashed by the Mormon Church.

If you thought you were annoyed by Bravo's endless cavalcade of big haired, bigger-titted, biggest mouthed ladies of the various Real Housewives franchises, just wait until you meet the Real Housewives of the Bible.

Texas congressman, libertaria agitator, and Internet deity Ron Paul has decided to wrap up his 12-term legacy of automatic "no" votes to every single bill. He will not run for his House seat in the next election. Good for him! If he stayed around much longer, he'd run the risk of becoming a bitter old crank.

Sherwood Schwartz, the TV producer that created two of the most oddly enduring sitcoms in TV history, The Brady Bunch and Gilligan's Island has died at 94. He passed away last night in his sleep.

Oh man, the Washington Post has caught hypocrite Michelle Obama red-handed, stuffing her hypocrite face with hypocrite hamburgers and shakes and fries at a diner. Why isn't she eating organic free-range slime and hippie grain dirt or whatever the hell she forces children to eat in school, hmm? Hypocrite. Fraud!

Here's a trailer for the Sundance drama Higher Ground, the directorial debut of actress Vera Farmiga, who also stars in the film. This well-received movie could mean big things for Farmiga, who's been teetering on the brink for a while.

All you aspiring screenwriters out there, crank up your keyboards, cause here is a "quirky" romantic comedy waiting to be written. A man in Russia broke into a hair salon and the owner of the salon beat him up, tied him to a radiator and kept him as a sex slave for three days.

Holy crap, not again. Chasing a home run hit at last night's MLB Home Run Derby at Chase Field in Phoenix, Keith Carmickle dove over a stadium barrier and would have crashed onto a deck by right field had his brother and friend not grabbed him in the nick of time:

Finally, Congress is doing something about those online child pornographers! The Protecting Children from Internet Pornographers Act of 2011 is supposed to save children from becoming victims of child pornography. What it actually does is let the government spy on you more easily.

Humphrey Cheung worked in journalism and IT for years. Then, this spring, he had enough. But instead of switching jobs, he strapped on a digital camera, armor, and flew to Libya. This is what a real rebellion looks like. [Gizmodo]

Free things in life are the best things. But free things that keep you entertained for hours and make you look like a genius are the greatest. Here's a new entry into that ring: Falling Stars, Trident Vitality's new digital toy for the iPad, iPhone or iPod Touch that was created to celebrate their delicious Awaken flavor. It'll turn you into the musician you never knew you could be, causing spontaneous bouts of admiration from passersby.

If we as a nation were to answer the question, "What are your two biggest problems?" the response would be "We are fat and broke." Well, you can't have it all, America. But you can be broke and skinnier!

Tom Felton has a record deal and a song about Hawaii. Jessica Simpson makes out with a purse. Mila Kunis compares sex to communism. The Black Eyed Peas take an "indefinite break." Tuesday gossip starts from scratch.