A former cast member has been casting his member (?) at spas and gyms in front of other men. Also today: a cheating actor, a political scion with a wandering eye, and a couple ending the affair.
Here is the saddest movie ever made, according to science: The Champ, starring Jon Voight. Watch it! A guy dies! In front of his son! After winning the, uh, boxing... trophy! Are you crying? Are you sobbing? Okay, whoa, stop, you're embarrassing yourself in front of your coworkers.
The peen protecting crusaders who brought you the anti-Semitic Aryan comic book hero "Foreskin Man" are on the verge of losing their hard-fought campaign to get an anti-circumcision bill on the city's November ballot, after San Francisco Superior Court Judge Loretta Giorgi yesterday said the proposal was "expressly preempted" by state law. From the San Francisco Chronicle's Heather Knight:
Sometimes you just have to trust that your government is willing to fight the good fight when comes to handling international crises. Take France and its production of foie gras — the not very humanely produced bird liver pate. The French take that shit pretty seriously. So when organizers of Germany's Anuga food fair banned French foie gras this year under pressure from animal rights groups, France's melodramatic external trade minister Pierre Lellouche shot back, saying the ban would have "global repercussions."
Colorado native Don Taylor, who describes himself as "a nonreligious individual," was stopped dead in his tracks when he stumbled upon this divine apparition on his daily routine. Yes, a creeping vine on a telephone pole had taken on the unmistakable form of a crucified Jesus Christ. Local authorities warn potential pilgrimage-makers not to climb the pole to kiss or embrace Telephone Pole Jesus, however, lest they want to receive a 765,000-volt message of peace and love from their Leafy Savior. [7News, photo via Don Taylor's Facebook]
Here's the trailer for The Ides of March, a political thriller loosely based on the play Farragut North (which was loosely based on Howard Dean's 2004 presidential campaign) that features George Clooney pulling triple duty as director, writer and star.
Here's the latest promo for Anderson Cooper's upcoming talk show, called simply, Anderson, and produced by Nosredna Studios. (Get it? Like Harpo? Because he's the next Oprah? Never mind.) Anyway, I think this promo is supposed to show you what a fun, dynamic, regular guy Anderson is — zipping around Manhattan on his mountain bike, occasionally stopping for a pickup game of basketball or chess in Tompkins Square Park, then off to Harlem to help some orphans and nuns paint a mural, then back to Chelsea for his TRX suspension training class, then cleaned up in a tuxedo at the Met for opening night of an all-male production of Madame Butterfly that just took Denmark by storm. Which I can totally get behind! I'd love to do all those things, too. But I'll probably just wind up sitting here on the couch with a pint of Greek yogurt watching Anderson instead. May I ask something, however? Where is Anderson's helmet? And why does he get his hair cut by Uzbek barbers in the East Village? In short, why doesn't Anderson care more about his head? A lot is riding on that precious silver noggin! Protect the head! Pamper the head! Cherish the head! [via HuffPo]
Tonight, Stephen Colbert opened the Report with talk of an imminent due date. No, not Tuesday's debt deadline, the one tomorrow night on Facebook for drivers of Nissan's electric car, the Leaf, to submit ideas for an official gesture to "wave" at fellow owners on the road. Which is lame and sad, of course, but nothing compared to the secondhand embarrassment you'll feel after making it to the end of Colbert's segment.
As Marge Simpson once put it, "We can't afford to shop in any store that has a philosophy." And the same might easily be said of anyone considering working at one, too. Welcome back to the Whole Foods Experience, where Whole Foods workers past and present—newly liberated by one Canadian employee's explosive kiss-off memo gone viral—reveal to Gawker what truly goes on behind the doors of the world's most "humanity-friendly" supermarket chain.
It's hard to really put one's finger on the precise moment a trend dies. Is it when you get your first photo of your mom planking on the washing machine? Or when adult soapbox derbies are profiled in a piece about the Portlandification of Brooklyn? Or, perhaps, when someone robs a cupcake store in Denver by waving around a syringe filled with HIV-positive blood? Yes, I do believe that last one would do it.
On tonight's Daily Show, Jon Stewart brought up the effort by Fox News and conservative pundits to push a narrative that paints liberals as bullies who do nothing but victimize pure, innocent Christians. But then Stewart played clip after clip of conservatives using bullying tactics against liberals, and it all fell spectacularly apart. Video of the segment is above.
The premiere of rave documentary Electric Daisy Carnival Experience at the famous Grauman's Chinese Theater has reportedly been cancelled after a larger-than-expected crowd showed up to see DJ Kaskade and ended up shutting down part of Hollywood Blvd.
Lady Gaga served as a guest judge on tonight's episode of So You Think You Can Dance. And in a shocking development that nobody saw coming, she was a bit over-the-top! But don't just take my word for it, watch the clip above and witness Gaga's transformation from blubbering mess, to condescending body language expert, to hip hop historian, to choreography connoisseur, to shoe-throwing self-promoter. All in just 60 minutes.
Well, here's a story not to think about next time you are in an enclosed space: A bank in Abbeville, La. that was undertaking renovations this year discovered a skeleton inside a chimney that had been closed for three decades.
As recently as January 2009, the FBI thought its agents ought to know the following crucial information about Muslims:
When nearly everyone thinks you're a con artist, it helps to have credible friends at your side. Paul Ceglia, the would be owner of Facebook, will have to do without such support; he's reportedly just plowed through his fourth law firm.
