Incredibly, the fecal proclivities of the wife of a presidential candidate are a matter of public record because there is nothing sacred to Donald Trump. So, with a quiet scream, let’s see what he has to say.

The first elected official who is able to pass a law ensuring that airplane seats are large enough for human beings to sit in will be incredibly popular. At the moment, we are still moving in the opposite direction.

Earlier today, a princess was granted a wish, and that wish was to blog. As it turns out, sometimes, if you truly believe in yourself, dreams really can come true.

When my former colleague Jason Parham reviewed Stanley Nelson’s documentary The Black Panthers: Vanguard of the Revolution last September, much of its retrospective content (dating back to the ‘60s) was uncannily relevant, given the growing amplification of dissatisfaction over racial inequality in this country, including but not limited to the routine police killings of unarmed black people. Parham wrote:

Justice Antonin Scalia was taking a free vacation at the exclusive Cibolo Creek Ranch in West Texas when he was found dead inside a guest room Saturday. The trip, the Washington Post reports, was a gift from the ranch’s owner, who just last year obtained a favorable result from the Supreme Court.

If you sat Tom Friedman in a chair, gave him a piece of paper, snapped your fingers to get his attention, and told him to write down America’s three greatest sources of strength, what would he do?

Just over two weeks after federal agents arrested nearly every single top official of the tiny town of Crystal City, TX, Mayor Ricardo Lopez was arrested yet again—this time, by his own police department. The mayor was attending the first city council meeting since the first arrest when the cops cuffed him.

If you’ll recall, a few days ago, Hillary Clinton barked like dog in an effort to mimic the Republican party. Now, Jeb Bush is mimicking Hillary mimicking the Republican party by doing—well, this.

FBI agents investigating the scene of the Oregon wildlife reserve occupation this week found a trench full of “significant amounts of human feces” that was apparently left by Ammon Bundy’s band of antigovernment militants. According to a court filing reported by Reuters, the shit hole was either on top of or next to “grounds containing sensitive artifacts” of the Burns Paiute Native American Tribe.

Apple says it has no intention of complying with a federal magistrate’s order to unlock the cell phone used by the San Bernardino shooters, calling the back door system requested by the court “too dangerous to create.”

Cliven Bundy was denied bail in Portland, Oregon, on Tuesday, the Guardian reports. He is charged with felony conspiracy to impede federal officers in connection with the 2014 at his Nevada ranch. “If he’s released and goes back to his ranch, that’s likely the last the court will see of him,” the judge said.

At a campaign rally in North Myrtle Beach, South Carolina, on Tuesday, Marco Rubio deflected a supporter’s suggestion to “waterboard Hillary” with a laugh. “The press is here,” he said, the AP reports, before smiling and adding, “I didn’t hear what they said. I know it wasn’t a bad word.”

Earlier today, after a campaign stop at the FN America manufacturing plant in Columbia, South Carolina, Jeb Bush tweeted a photograph (caption: “America.”) of a .45-caliber handgun engraved with his name. As it happens, FN America is a subsidiary of the Belgian company FN Herstal, which, the Washington Post points out, was requisitioned by the Nazis in its previous incarnation as Fabrique Nationale d’Armes de Guerre.

At the Brookings Institution on Tuesday, Neel Kashkari, a senior Treasury Department official in the Bush and Obama administrations, said that he believes “the biggest banks are still too big to fail and continue to pose a significant, ongoing risk to our economy.”

As we near ever closer to Kristin Cavallari’s literary debut and the sweet release of death, new details about the promotional schedule for Balancing in Heels have emerged. Today Kristin announced that she plans to embark on a cross-country “book tour” next month, making stops in “NYC, Chicago, and LA.”

After a federal judge ruled that the NYPD’s use of stop-and-frisk was unconstitutional in 2013, and New York City elected its most liberal mayor in at least two decades the following year, the going theory has been that cops here would all but abandon the practice in favor of arresting lots of poor people—also known as “broken windows policing.” As it turns out, they’re still doing their fair share of stopping and frisking.

Neel Kashkari, the current Minneapolis Fed president and former Goldman Sachs banker who led the US Treasury’s bank bailout program in 2008, says that major banks are still “Too Big to Fail,” and that we should consider breaking them up. I’m sick of these crazy ideas from radicals who don’t understand Wall Street.

What havoc has been wreaked by Beyoncé’s black pride and the mere suggestion that she’s sick of the blatant disregard for black lives that some police officers exhibit? A real live shooting outside of the Tennessee home of Rutherford County Sheriff Robert Arnold, for one, according to that sheriff. Regarding eight shots Arnold heard last night outside his home, the sheriff told local news station WATE:

After civil wars and/or American interventions destroyed the economies of Libya, Iraq, and Syria, some of the most stable, well-paying jobs left were with the Islamic State. But a new report suggests ISIS grunt work has gone from lucrative and exciting to a real crummy slog.