On Super Bowl Sunday, President Obama told CBS' Scott Pelley that the Boy Scouts of America should end its ban on gays. Today, BSA board members decided to table a vote on whether the group should lift that ban, saying in a statement that "the organization needs time for a more deliberate review of its membership policy." The board will now vote on the measure in May, potentially bringing an end to the century-old BSA's longstanding and bullshit rule preventing gay boys from becoming scouts and gay men from becoming scout leaders. Alas, if and when that vote ever does come to pass, it's important to remember that the BSA doesn't actually intend to fully "end" anything.

To highlight labor inequities, adjunct professors ask students not to call them "Professor." Okay, Not Real Professor.

The "bare fleshy under curves" of everyone's buttocks are drooping a little lower today, as CBS' Standards & Practices department has issued a harshly-worded email forbidding all Grammy attendees from flashing their softest, roundest parts (boobies, butts, and "puffy" crotch skin) on camera.

If Goethe were a 14-year-old girl living in modern times, his Faust might have played out like the real-life story of Rachel Baier, a Massachusetts teen who was convinced by her dad to quit Facebook in exchange for money.

This coming April, Broadway's biggest tourist trap will be going dark. Of course Spider-Man: Turn Off the Dark isn't closing, it makes like a billion dollars a day. But it will be turning on the dark for one special performance geared specifically toward children on the autism spectrum.

Serial employee-assaulter, probable perjurer and popularizer of the phrase "I'm not here for that" Naomi Campbell is a "coach" on and executive producer of Oxygen's new modeling show The Face. Per the series' brazen ads, the reality competition combines the guts of America's Next Top Model with the team-oriented angle of The Voice. Basically, this means that supermodel mentors Campbell, Karolína Kurková and Coco Rocha are creating sororities out young (but not, you know, young enough) aspiring clothes hangers.

Police in San Antonio say a group of friends panicked after one of them accidentally shot another in the back, and tried to pin the whole thing on a "Hispanic male" who never existed.

Have you made plans for this weekend that include traveling outside of your house for even the briefest moment? Cancel them! Or maybe make more of them? The Northeast is about to get walloped or tenderly caressed with either a couple inches or a couple feet of snow.

The Augsburg branch of Germany's Federal Labor Office was forced to apologize to a 19-year-old woman who was inadvertently assigned to work at a local brothel without her knowledge.

People of color looking to break into the startup world or tech journalism will be happy to learn, per blowhard entrepreneur Jason Calacanis, that "there isn't a race wall in tech." Why, then, is tech journalism so overwhelmingly white (not to mention male)? Calacanis, who is white, isn't sure, but he has some advice: Be more like Jason Calacanis.

The musician Claire Boucher, better known as Grimes, is responsible for one of last year's most acclaimed indie albums, Visions. This morning, she posted an essay on her Tumblr regarding her pop-filled best-of 2012 music list. In it, she praised Beyoncé ("She is everything good"), "Gangam Style" mastermind Psy ("Psy is a genius and I don't think it's so terrible that he's been recognized for this") and Mariah Carey ("The first time I heard Mariah Carey it shattered the fabric of my existence and I started Grimes").

Denver police are investigating a shooting this morning that left three dead, including two children. Another child was injured and taken to the hospital; all three children involved are under 10 years old.

Neil Drumming is a veteran journalist who's written and edited for the Washington City Paper, Entertainment Weekly, and elsewhere. Last year, he decided to turn his screenplay into a movie, and—unlike many other would-be filmmakers—actually made it happen. His film Big Words is making its NYC premiere at BAM next Friday.

Surveillance footage showing city workers in Tel Aviv painting a handicapped spot around a woman's legally parked car and towing her car away has shocked many around the world after it was uploaded to the victim's Facebook page.

We would all like to know as much as we can about the Obama Administration's top-secret program of assassinating U.S. citizens with drones, so we can figure out how best not to get assassinated. But don't look to the pages of U.S. newspapers like the Washington Post, which cooperated with the Administration to cover-up the location of a key drone base.

Have you heard the one about the disgruntled cuckold who discovered his editor wife was cheating with a literary-agency heir and forwarded their sexts to the scion's powerful father, agency partners, and a few other innocent bystanders? Oh no? Let the New York Post tell you.

An elementary school in Colorado has suspended a second grader for violating one of its "absolutes" prohibiting games involving pretend weapons.

If you enjoyed the heart-pounding action of Saving Private Ryan and the taut intrigue of The Da Vinci Code, you'll love dynamic thrill ride that is: The Son of the Star of Those Movies Lost His iPad.

Honey Boo Boo's mom says she dropped 100+ lbs., since the show started filming. Whatever she lost, the TV added back.

Do you own a dog? Is your dog's name "Ranger?" Why not? Do you sometimes—because you love Ranger very much—go to the special pet store and buy him special, more expensive "Science Diet" dog food that is scientifically formulated to be food, for dogs? You monster. You're feeding your dog science? How is that even natural?