I got my black shirt on. I got my black gloves on. I got my ski mask on. This shit's been too long. COP ANNOYER, better you than me! COP ANNOYER, fuck police tranquility!

Salaheddin Barhoum and Yassine Zaimi, the Boston-area runners whose faces were slapped on the front page of the New York Post as possible terrorists by possible pig-fucking racist Col Allan, are suing the paper for libel, negligent infliction of emotional distress, and invasion of privacy.

On New Year's Eve last year, a cat was caught smuggling tools into a Brazilian prison. News of that attempt apparently spread to Russia, where at least one inmate inside a north Russian jail convinced an outsider to strap two cell phones to a black-and-white cat before sending the cat crawling over the prison's fence. Alas, this cat was also busted before he could make the delivery.

At least six people were killed and 13 were injured in Wednesday's building collapse in Philadelphia, though there is some good news; a 61-year-old woman was found alive in the building's rubble 13 hours after the collapse.

CNN released a video of Michelle Obama responding to a heckler last night. The initial confrontation is only on audio, but later there's shaky cell-phone footage of the First Lady walking off-stage before the crowd convinces her to return.

Today, we located the house where the infamous photo of Rob Ford with his arms around two kids who were later gunned down in a gangland-style shooting was taken. It's in Toronto's Etobicoke neighborhood, near the intersection of Windsor Rd. and Kingsview Blvd., in the shadow of the apartment towers where Ford told his staff the crack video was being kept. Here's a picture.

Since at least April, the National Security Agency has been collecting the telephone records of every Verizon customer in the US. In total, the NSA has gathered data from millions of Verizon customers, including for phone calls placed within the US and for calls made from the US to other countries.

Earlier today, electronic music duo the Knocks posted a picture of far more famous electronic duo Daft Punk playing beer pong at the office of their record label, Columbia. Daft Punk are also known as Guy-Manuel de Homem-Christo and Thomas Bangalter, and also robots since they are almost never photographed without their trademark helmets.

University of Minnesota biomedical engineering professor Bin He has been working on a brain-computer interface that allows people to steer robots with their thoughts. In the video above, young students manipulate a flying machine right, left, up, and down using only their minds (e.g. think about making a fist with your right hand to make it turn right).

According to NBC News, the CIA didn't always know who it was targeting with its drone strikes in Pakistan. Roughly 25 percent of those killed over a 14-month period were listed as “other militants,” meaning the CIA wasn't sure how the person killed was affiliated with terrorist organizations, if they were at all.

If you haven't already seen this little bit of detritus floating around the internet today, Ethan Hawke did a Reddit AMA this morning and was so freaking charming everyone's heads fell off and rolled away (so be careful reading this because YOUR head could be next). There to promote his new movies, Before Midnight and The Purge, Hawke handled his first Reddit experience like a real Estella in Paris (very sexual, distrusting of men).

A Providence, Rhode Island, mother whose teenage daughter was shot during a family member's kindergarten graduation party was clearly in no mood for reporters when approached by a news crew from the local ABC affiliate WLNE.

Baba Shetty, CEO of NewsBeast since September 2012, today left the company, which is reportedly in the midst of trying to offload Newsweek. Tina Brown broke the news in a memo, which also revealed that Rhona Murphy would be the interim CEO.

Beyoncé's been making Kelly Rowland cry a lot lately. More than usual, probably.

Kerry Lauerman, editor-in-chief of Salon.com, is now a startup bro, just like everyone else. After 13 years, he's leaving Salon to join a "content and commerce" site, incubated by Lerer Ventures, the venture capital firm launched by Huffington Post cofounder Ken Lerer.

Bloomberg View columnist and longtime Newsweek man Jonathan Alter has a new book coming out that includes details about jowly shithead Roger Ailes, the head of Fox News. Politico's media reporter Dylan Byers writes that excerpts from the book show that Alter "reveals a number of surprising facts about the Fox News chief that, taken together, make him out to appear extraordinarily paranoid." Yes, Roger Ailes is paranoid. But Alter didn't "reveal" anything new at all.

There's teaching your Siberian Husky to play dead, and then there's teaching your Siberian Husky to play dead like a low-rent villain from a super-hammy grindhouse flick.

The city of Baltimore is plagued by poverty and crime. Which is unfortunate, since its jails are plagued by corruption, sex, and contraband.

Someone compiled all of the audience "Oooohs" in Saved by the Bell and it sounds like a roller coaster of teen group-think hysteria.

Octogenarian Gloria Mackenzie, a resident of Zephyrhills, Florida, came forward today to claim last month's $590 million Powerball jackpot, the largest in the lottery game's history. Mackenzie wisely opted out of participating in a press conference, but Florida lottery officials read a statement from her in which she wrote that she bought her winning ticket after "another lottery ticket buyer was very kind enough to let me go ahead of her on the supermarket line."