This is perhaps not the most surprising news but, according to a new study, most Americans are unhappy at work.

A 46-year-old man was arrested Friday for assaulting a college security guard, after the guard had to gall to interrupt the man, who was dressed as a woman, from snapping pictures inside a student-only area in a female dorm.

Good news! The new strain of the bird flu is less deadly than the previous strain. It will only kill 36 percent of people sick enough to be hospitalized, which is pretty good compared to the previous strain's 70 percent fatality rate.

After six weeks of conservative handwringing about reports that the IRS was unfairly targeting Tea Party groups seeking tax-exempt status, the new head of the federal tax body is suggesting that it wasn't just right-wing groups being inappropriately scrutinized.

The NYC-based bike courier service Dutch Express bills itself as the city's "most reliable same day courier service." Unfortunately, as Dutch Express surely knows, swiftness often comes at a price — like, say, not thinking twice before sending out a promotional mailer that might be seen as racist by your potential clientele.

Full House and Juicy J match up surprisingly well.

Hello, do you wonder what is the newest fashionable thing to wear this summer? You've come to right internet site (Gawker.com). We can now EXCLUSIVELY report that, according to other reports, the following things are the "hottest" fashions, this summer.

The L.A. coroner's office has ruled the death of a woman found in a hotel cistern as an accidental drowning with "other significant conditions, being bipolar disorder." The Toronto Sun reports authorities didn't explain how Elisa Lam got into the tank, from which guests drew water for days before she was found.

Once upon a time there lived a beautiful young woman, who flew east through the clouds following a series of vehicular crimes in order to develop a fashion line and a perfume line as well as many other exciting projects. Sadly, far away from the Pacific sun, her spirit hardened into something strange; a cold, bitter, angry thing, unrecognizable to the friends who had known only her light. A restless wraith, she glided through spas and shopping malls, over sidewalks and streets, eager to show herself but desperate not to be seen. People would catch flashes of her in mirrors, in pools of water, in out-of-the-way luxury hotels.

No matter who you are or where you live, chances are your parents expect you to fix their computer for free.

Where's Edward Snowden? As I write this, only a handful of people know exactly the location of the world famous NSA whistleblower, after he apparently ditched his flight from Moscow to Cuba last night. One of those people is Wikileaks founder Julian Assange. Snowden is "safe and healthy" and his "spirits are high," Assange told reporters begging for any scrap of information on a conference call this morning. It is this secret knowledge that has paradoxically thrust Assange's anti-secrecy outlet back into the media spotlight after a long period of decline. Now there's hints of another massive leak. Wikileaks is back, God help us all.

On Sunday morning, Edward Snowden boarded an Aeroflot flight in Hong Kong, landing in Moscow more than 13 hours later. We think. The truth is, no one's quite sure where the NSA leaker is—Moscow? Havana? Quito? Reykjavik? (He's not on Aeroflot Flight 180, we know that much.) But we can reconstruct his movements—and speculate where he's headed.

A red panda missing from the National Zoo was found and captured in a bush in D.C.'s Adams Morgan neighborhood this afternoon. He was probably just after some Jumbo Slice.

The New York Times' "Room for Debate" online feature is grappling with the news that Sushi Yasada Yasuda—where lunch bills seem to run in the triple figures—has implemented a no-tipping policy, because it pays its staff full salary and benefits, as is the "custom in Japan."

If you're anything like me, you don't need to be reminded that yet another record that shaped your musical upbringing is twenty fucking years old. But Liz Phair's Exile in Guyville was recorded in 1993, and it's a good thing because Jessica Hopper has pulled together an oral history for Spin that will make you forget all about whitechocolatespaceegg and send you careening back to the days when indie rock was a dude thing and girls didn't play guitar and a record by a young lady that mentioned sexy parts but also wasn't explicitly for dancing was novel enough to merit attention from NPR and ladies like Liz Phair were hanging out with Winona Ryder and Rosanna Arquette backstage at Beck shows (above).

An unlikely turf war took place over the weekend in Boston, if former heartthrob and Backstreet Boy's brother Aaron Carter is to be believed.

World's most insufferable atheist Richard Dawkins opened Saatchi & Saatchi's New Directors Showcase at Cannes last week with a brief speech on "memes," a term and concept he introduced in his 1976 book The Selfish Gene. While the first 5 minutes of Dawkins' lecture were pretty standard fare, the last 3 minutes and 47 seconds were some kind of seapunk/EDM/psychotropic mashup, complete with Dawkins coming out to do a quick ditty on an electronic woodwind instrument at the end.

Slate cites a deeply implausible statistic in an item about masturbation habits: "A 2010 survey found that 75 percent of 16- and 17-year-old boys had masturbated in the past year." Seventy-five percent, you say. The other 25 percent didn't have their writing hands free to answer the survey.

Anthony Kiedis was entering the Four Seasons in Philly last week when a bodyguard mistook him for a fan trying to sneak into the hotel to see the Rolling Stones and put him in chokehold.

We are looking for a missing red panda, a male named Rusty. He was last seen at 6 p.m. last night. pic.twitter.com/JHVB79x8XY