HBO confirms that the upcoming third season of The Newsroom, set for a fall 2014 premiere, will be the series' last. The Newsroom's internal chronology, on two-year delay from reality, is expected to cover the massacre at Sandy Hook Elementary School as well as the Boston Marathon bombing.

On Saturday, Mitt Romney spoke at a conference for young, single Mormons. Who cares, right? But he also tried to dance.

Last night at the Golden Globes, the legendary director and writer Woody Allen was presented with the Cecil B. DeMille lifetime achievement award. Everyone applauded–except for Allen's former family. "[D]id they put the part where a woman publicly confirmed he molested her at age 7 before or after Annie Hall?" Allen's son Ronan Farrow wondered sarcastically.

After a conspicuous 12-year absence from his desk, newly departed New York City mayor Mike Bloomberg returned to work this morning at his flagship media company, Bloomberg LP, in midtown Manhattan. Executives welcomed him with prosecco, cheers, and, we imagine, bated-breath obscenities.

Two former Fullerton, California, cops charged with killing a schizophrenic homeless man, Kelly Thomas, in 2011 were found not guilty of all charges today. Kelly Thomas' father, Ron Thomas, told the Los Angeles Times he is "stunned" by the verdict.

The Nybro Action Team consists of Hjalmar Sveinbjőrnsson and Alex Bejerstrand, two under-employed friends living in Nybro, a small industrial town in southern Sweden. Hjalmar is a chef; Alex takes woodworking courses. They will be recapping Season 3 of HBO's Girls.

A man in Texas was sentenced to six months in jail for a dispute over his child support, even though he's paid his ex-wife exactly what he owed her.

For more than a century, the state of Mississippi has allowed the inmates of its prison system to behave as if they are human beings capable of familial relationships, providing well-behaved prisoners the chance to briefly spend time alone with their spouses. On February 1, falling in line with prevailing trends in American justice, the state will stop allowing the visits.

Sick burn, dude.

Here's a great lede: "Kanye West just attacked an 18-year-old guy inside the waiting room of a chiropractor's office..." Of course he did.

When the FBI Press Office uses Twitter, it sends a half-dozen tweets in one second, and then there's nothing for a day or three.

A man was arrested on Sunday after he confessed to killing and then eating his landlord's heart after a disagreement over a year-long chess game.

[Vice President Joe Biden stands with Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu, his wife Sarah, and former British Prime Minister Tony Blair at a state funeral held on Monday for late Israeli Prime Minister Ariel Sharon. He died on Saturday. Image via AP.]

Some people thought that Detroit, a city that is bankrupt, might have to sell off the valuable art in its art museum in order to help pay its debts. Detroit will not have to do this after all.

The animal-focused site The Dodo launched today, and its lead piece is an in-depth look at the impact the documentary Blackfish has had (and may have still) on SeaWorld. It's so rare that docs have this much pull in the real world.

Backstage at the Golden Globes, Jacqueline Bisset blamed her insane acceptance speech on not realizing that her category was up and thinking about her dinner. Then she said that she didn't remember what she said. Queen Bisset continues to crush.

The plot behind KellerCancerGate thickens: The note on Emma Keller's since-deleted hit piece on a cancer-fighting tweeter now states, "This post has been removed pending investigation." A spokesman for the Guardian tells Gawker that "aspects of the investigation are on-going."

A moviegoer shot two people—one of them fatally—this afternoon, reportedly after one of them refused to stop texting during a movie.

Hola sirs, please to be checking el site CuidadoElSalud.gov if you are in needing of excelente coverages of your loveds for the Obama health plans. This is why our name of the website is en español "For the Caution of Health." Mija, what the fuck are these cabrónes federal on about?

Police in Chicago say a Minnesota man was pronounced dead after attempting to retrieve his cellphone from the iced-over waters of the Chicago River just after midnight on Monday.