When the faceless editors of Wikipedia decide an article is not fit for public consumption, it’s gone, only accessible to the site’s top editors—at least, it was. But now we’re keeping track of all the articles Wikipedia doesn’t see fit to print, to present you with very best of the site’s weirdest and worst. Please, enjoy.

Barney Cam VII: A Red, White and Blue Christmas

Apparently, back during the Bush administration, First Dog Barney had a yearly Christmas video series. Miss Beazley, the lesser Bush dog, was barely granted a walk-on role for reasons unknown. Barney Cam VII was Barney’s last hurrah as a dog-in-chief and perhaps the only good thing to come out of Bush’s presidency.

Best Line:

This page is distressingly short, so here is the summary in full:

It is the Bush family’s last Christmas at the White House, and Barney decides that this year’s decoration should be patriotic. So he scampers around the house decorating before he falls asleep and dreams of being an athlete.

And dream Barney does.

I would also recommend Barney’s second cinematic foray, Barney Reloaded.

Why it got deleted:

Because “there’s no way this is even remotely notable.” Also because Wikipedia hates freedom and quality cinema.

Why it shouldn’t have been:

Barney is a patriot. After all, as the screencap below can attest, he literally dreams in red, white, and blue.

Simón Jiménez

Simón Jiménez was a (likely apocryphal) Colombian badass, “bandit,” and “criminal who was known by contemporaries from his early teens for his ruthless attitude to the authorities who opposed him.” In other words, an early 19th century Kid Rock.

Best Line:

The entire aside about Simón’s little teeth business is a good lesson for young entrepreneurs:

He experienced a quiet up bringing from his Spanish padres, but in his early teens he went off the rails. He made his money initially from selling dentures (which were made at the time with dead soldiers’ teeth) but decided that such a career was not sufficiently profitable... The money he received from leading these raids was apparently sufficient for him to retire from his denture business.

While his death is a good lesson for antics-loving hooligans everywhere:

He suffered an early death when the Colombian state tired of his antics and he was executed.

Why it got deleted:

“Possible hoax or mistranslation.” Or because like Colombia, Wikipedia’s editors grew bored of his teenage antics.

Why it shouldn’t have been:

Rude to denture salesmen.

1899 NCAA Bocce Ball Championship

A very fair and reasonable recounting of the best NCAA championship of any sport of any time.

Best Line

The whole thing:

This is widely regarded as the best NCAA championship of any sport of all time. It was a thrilling match which will be remembered throughout all of time. Georgia Tech emerged victorious over Yale when all was said and done. The match took place in an open field. The MVP of the game was the legendary Timothy Galler, who went on to be the greatest bocce player of the 20th century. 100% of people who know anything about anything at all agree that this bocce ball match was even better than the 2016 NCAA men’s basketball Championship game in Houston. You’ve been warned, ok?

Why it got deleted:

One editors says, “Seems to be a prank.” Another calls it an “obvious hoax/joke.”

Why it shouldn’t have been:

You can’t just delete a legend.

Hugh Edwards (actor)

Hugh Edwards played Piggy in 1963's Lord of the Flies. While Piggy himself is dead, Hugh Edwards is still very much alive. And for those of you who haven’t read the book or seen the movie, don’t read the sentence right before this one if you don’t want to know that Piggy dies.

Best Line:

This is the entire thing. It’s one line long:

Hugh Edwards is an English businessman best known for his one child acting role, as “Piggy” in the 1963 film Lord of the Flies.

Why it got deleted:

From the Wiki powers that be:

I found several sources to improve the article (expanding on the movie - he was the only boy from England, he was the only actor that improvised his speaking role, etc.) But I won’t bother improving the article since it’s still not notable.

Piggy improvised! Prior to this article, I had no idea, but now I’ve learned something. Why won’t you let me learn?

Why it shouldn’t have been:

Piggy has suffered enough. (Because he dies.)

On a semi-related noted, here’s a terrible edited version of Piggy’s death I just found. Poor Piggy.

Don’t watch that if you don’t want to know that he dies.