It’s almost 2016, and with such little time left to complete new year’s resolutions from last year, your friends or loved ones might be finding themselves desperately looking to get in better shape. May you interest them in a holiday crash diet?

Merry Garden Foldable Adirondack Chair ($56)

Sit in this chair

3M Utility Duct Tape 2929 Silver, 1.88 in x 50 yd 5.8 mils (Pack of 1) ($8.24)

Tape yourself to the chair.

VIPERTEK Double Lock Steel Police Edition Professional Grade Handcuffs (Black) ($15.98)

For good measure, how about you handcuff yourself to the chair?

IV Start Kit Medi-Pak ($5.34)

Plunge this IV into you arm.

Audubon Birds Page-A-Day Gallery Calendar 2016 ($14.54)

Don’t get up until New Year’s day. At least you won’t be hungover.

Contact the author at jordan@gawker.com.