Kraft, owner of hot dog giant and personal friend of mine Oscar Mayer, has recalled 96,000 pounds of Oscar Mayer Classic Wieners because they weren't plain wieners. They were different wieners—stuffed with cheese.

The hot dogs, already having hit the shelves (but luckily well before summer broiling and BBQ season hits its stride), were manufactured in Columbia, MO, and could be a danger to those with intolerance to lactose.

The agency said the product labels are incorrect and do not reflect the ingredients associated with the pasteurized cheese in the cheese dogs. Those products were made with milk, a known allergen, which is not declared on the label.

What was being sold?

  • Classic Cheese Dogs

But in what package?

  • Classic Wiener Dogs

Check your freezer or the underneath of your bed or your sadness cave to find out if you've been fed a cheesy lie. And return those dogs immediately. You can also give Kraft a call personally at (855) 688-4386 and demand you get the right dogs back.

[Image via AP]