'ROID RAGE!!! GRRRR!!!!' and Other Angry Sentiments We Received This Week
It's Memorial Day Weekend, guys! Throw your computers in the garbage and get to weekend-ing. But first, please enjoy this week's hate mail roundup.
A Painkilled Ramble
Dear Gawker,
I write this as i am a little drunk and painkilled (the past tense?) but I do have one thing to say. Though i love gawker and all the sister sites (thanks nick!) i do feel gawker has gotten a bit to cynical and pessimistic (aj to blame?). Not that i don't love ripping apart some people that deserve it, but i feel like every article at this point is just a "this is why i hate you" rant. I get it, there are many things to hate. But there are times i just want the facts with a funny story, or something similar, and not necessarily a total buttfuck to everyone involved.
Just the tip, as they say. But keep up the rest of the good stuff.
It Puts the F-Word In the Post
Dear Editor:
And now it creeps in to destroy our language. Suddenly in the middle of your story "The Times-Picayune and the Completely Logical Collapse of the Newspaper Industry" you manage to insert the f-word.
Now, I am no prude by any stretch of the imagination. However, there is a time and place for everything, and this story isn't it.
The only way I can see this expletive finding its way into a legitimate news story is that the writer/editor is so immune to the word that it escaped his attention.
You should be ashamed of yourself.
Tom B.
Here Is a Clue
Thanks for the laughs on the bodybuilding article. I must admit that I am that kind of person who laughs out loud when someone publicly embarrasses themselves which you so clearly did in writing such a pathetic piece of shit.
You sound like 12 year old girl with your stereotyping and gay insinuations.
BODYBUILDERS ARE GROSS AND WEIRD AND ALL ON STEROIDS.
Really? That's all you could come up with? Are you a child?
Here is a clue: Some people do things that are different from what you do or from what you define as "normal" in your tiny world. You must really struggle to get by each day not being able to understand any of the strangeness around you. It is sad to see someone struggle so mightily to understand the behaviours and motivations of other people that were different than their own. I guess those BA's really ARE useless. You're so boring.
Oh and if you think that working out should be for "function" only (whatever the fuck that means) then you really ARE that lame and naive.
Jen Aniston's Satanic G Train Practices
Jen Aniston has sex with nerd yuppies in new york city on the G Train from Church Ave Brooklyn,....... That train station in particular is known for its large rodents, and teams of opposum that jump and play all over the station, as they run they drive other large hidden rodents out into the open out of fear for being prey.....the rodents they eat also jump and do not fail to jump on people out of fear for their lives....she knows this, so it is satanic for he to use a station like this for mating in front of others?
Not Bronzed, That's Racist
Lolo Jones' mother is white and her father is black. In America that's enough to get you categorized as "black" or at least African American. Cases in point: Barack Obama and Halle Berry. There are a lot of black people who would be offended by a reference to their "bronzed" form or "tan," even if the writer or speaker meant it as a compliment. Perhaps Jones will be offended if she reads your item. If it were me, I'd revise it, edit it.
I am going to assume that you are not a track and field fan, otherwise you'd probably know of her race and probably would have been a little suspicious about any story concerning a world-class American white sprinter. When was the last time a white American was favored to win a gold medal at the Olympics—as Jones was in 2008—in any race less than 800 meters?
Still, I enjoy Gawker and look forward to seeing it nearly every day.
Girls Hate When John Writes About Girls
Dear gawker,
here is a tip :
You should get better writers . I've been one of your reader for as long as I can remember and I can't tell you how much I've loved you over the year. I love the redesign & new comment system . Your real problem has become editorial content.John cook is a terrible writer and he is exactly what your readership thinks is wrong with your site today.
He isn't funny . He isn't talented. He should be a fox writer. Not a gawker writer. He just doesn't have the witty voice Your readership expects.
His recap of HBO girls make him sound like a high school bully who confuses "mean" with "witty" . And he doesn't even have the sense humor to get the good parts of the show . ( I'm not saying i'm a huge fan of girls but this is a good example of why he is bad for gawker. Non constructive criticism was never a gawker thing ... Denunciating things that needed to be was one.)I wouldn't care if I had any other sites I enjoyed reading as much as you ... But please don't just become this terrible website .
I just miss the old gawker so much ... Bring it back . I know you can .
Chlo
The Treaty of Tripoli
This is not a christian nation... I'm sick of hearing ignorant Americans such as yourself claim that. The treaty of Tripoli says, "As the Government of the United States of America is not, in any sense, founded on the Christian religion." Even many of our founding fathers were deists and not christian. "Other notable Founding Fathers may have been more directly deist. These include James Madison, possibly Alexander Hamilton, Ethan Allen,[44] and Thomas Paine (who published The Age of Reason, a treatise that helped to popularize deism throughout the USA and Europe)."
sources: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Treaty_of_Tripoli , http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Deism
Preach
Why aren't the commenters on Gawker funny anymore? Go back to screening these people, please. I don't have time at work to sift through the crap to find the short but funny comments. I also don't care about a woman in her late 20s with a disabled vagina that gives and gets oral but doesn't have sex.
I don't mind not being funny enough to be able to comment on Gawker. Not everyone is funny/clever. If there are unfunny/unclever people that can't deal with the rejection of not having their unfunny/unclever posts appear on a website message board that is intended to be funny/clever… well, fuck them. They shouldn't ruin things for all the unfunny/unclever people who just want to read some good one-liners about attractive virgin Olympians and then get back to work.
:(
Mr. Hamilton.
Thank you so much for helping me realize that years of grueling workouts, dieting and dedication had turned me into a "freakazoid weirdo". Words can not express how shocked I was to realize that I had become a vain, narcissistic, closeted, mirror gawking douche. And my lack of functionality IS ASTOUNDING! I sure wish I was like those crossfit guys…I've lost count of how many times I've been walking on the side walk (on my way to buy more string tank tops and tanning products) when I've encountered an obstacle in my path and the only way over it was one of those awesome kipping pull-ups or to clean and press it out of my way! It's almost enough to throw me into a ROID RAGE!!! GRRRR!!!!
Thank you for showing me that the path to physique mediocrity is the only way to be truly happy and normal. Goals are for losers!
Regards,
A vain, shallow, insecure, non functional man
Preach, Again
Hi Max
Thanks
Jon.