It's Easier Than Ever to Get Married While Drunk at a Seaside New Jersey Hellscape
Atlantic City: the biggest shithole on the East Coast, where blocks of open-air crack markets immediately give way to cut-rate seedy casinos full of doomed and hopeless poverty-level day trippers in a geographic continuum of vice and despair unequaled anywhere in its chemical spill-laden state of New Jersey. Now it's easier to have your wedding there. Alert your spouse-to-be.
The world class New Jersey state legislature has passed a law making it easier to get married and divorced in the state, with an eye on turning Atlantic City into a "destination" for weddings between drunk men and paid escorts. It could soon be possible to demonstrate your poor understanding of statistical probability in the fields of both gambling and matrimony in a single, crack-fueled visit to the Jersey Shore.
One day Chris Christie could be President of the United States of America.
