Now you can own the very pot Alec Baldwin refuses to shit or get off of. The 30 Rock star is unloading his 3,000 square-foot apartment in the El Dorado on Central Park West. Asking price? $9,500,000.

You'll have to pony up 50 percent up front, according to the listing, but that price affords you "astounding views, [a] wood burning fireplace, a formal dining room, paneled library and windowed powder room." Also in the floorplan: an ample maid's quarters, perfect for caving in during heated nanny-negotiations. [Corcoran via Curbed, photo of Baldwin via WENN]