In your hijacked Friday media column: Tina Brown has breasts and used to do it, sexually speaking, to Martin Amis; the Washington Post Co. falls from the profit curve; Robin Roberts may or may not be too tall for morning television, and Howard Kurtz once again acquits himself with the dignity and effortless charisma we've come to expect from him.

  • Little-known magazine functionary Tina Brown gets the star treatment in a New York Times Magazine profile. Takeaways: Brown banged Martin Amis ("we went off for a great meal, and then, you know, two days later...") as well as a bunch of other British dudes? "At Tatler she penned a salty 'guide to London bachelors'.... 'I am here to tell you,' she wrote of one Simon Oakes, 'that his melting approach conceals an astonishing pre-happy-hour horniness that has earnt him, among other nicknames, ‘Any time Oakes.'" Also, Brown sounds like a great boss once she's taken the time to comprehend that you exist—"People keep showing up. We discovered we have a Japanese correspondent!"—and she made her name in London by ditching sourcing agreements and reporting candid off-the-record conversations because "the truth is, as a young girl, you can get a lot done." So you can trust Newsweek to protect you, anonymous sources of America. Finally, good luck forgetting this sentence: "Under a black suit, she wore a white shirt unbuttoned enough to display the cleavage that inspired Private Eye to dub her a 'buxom hackette' when she was 25."
  • Profits fell 67% at the Washington Post Co. last quarter. For once, though, it's not because of the newspaper! The newspaper division, including the Washington Post, held steady in terms of revenue and only lost $12.8 million, as opposed to $13.8 million a year ago. Progress! The drop comes from the Kaplan Education division, which is having trouble scamming people into paying for fake college like it used to.
  • The Daily says Robin Roberts is being edged off Good Morning America in part because she's so much taller than co-anchor and tiny Greek George Stephanopoulos: "They can't get too close or she towers over him," a source told The Daily. The New York Daily News, however, says it's bullshit, calling the Daily story "trash."
  • The Daily Beast's Howard Kurtz tried to write an item about how Eric Stonestreet, who plays "the fat guy" on ABC's Modern Family, talked to White House chief of staff Bill Daley at the White House Correspondent's Dinner. But television is confusing and fat people all look alike so it came out as "the fat guy on the cartoon show-Seth MacFarlane?" and "ABC's Family Guy." Everyone knows that if you put a question mark at the end you can just write whatever, but Stonestreet was unamused.
  • Demand Media says it will start paying up to $350 to experienced writers for 800-word items in order to combat its image as a content farm. Which is better than the Daily Beast pays.
  • Oprah Winfrey has fired the CEO of her new TV network just two years after launching the company and four months after going on the air.
  • The Tribune Co. has selected Los Angeles Times publisher Eddy Hartenstein as its CEO, ending a six-month interregnum after horny chief executive Randy Michaels was ousted last year.

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