We figured DJ Paulie Disco would be the first of MTV's guidos to land a recording contract, but TMZ got their hands on a snippet of The Situation's single. It's sort of like a Snooki punch to your eardrums.

The sad part is that it barely has any of Mike "The Situation" Sorrentino's rapping, it's just an insane house music beat and crazy voice going, "Whoa, whoa, Situation." The single—called "The Situation" so that we will be even more confused between whether "The Situation" refers to the single, the person, or a real set of circumstances actually described as "the situation"—is a collaboration between The Sitch, Fatman Scoop, DJ Class, and The Disco Fries. Are these their real professional names, or did they pick something from the Jersey Shore nickname generator so that their real identities won't be connected to this project?

Of course, the tune is the kind of thing that would get a bunch of dudes hopped up on Red Bull and vodkas and wearing Ed Hardy ripoffs beating up the beat on the dance floor, but no one with something passing as taste would dare admit to liking it. We can't wait to hear the whole thing (next week on iTunes!) so that we can give a full dissection of The Situation's hip-hop skillz and the sure to be mind-bending lyrics of his first musical outing.

But isn't he a little tardy to the reality-stars-with-singles party? You know your life is sad when Kim Zolciak from Real Housewives of Atlanta has a catchier track than you do.