The only way to "make it" in the media now is to pay a huge bribe to secure a coveted "intern" slot at a failing media outlet, where you can begin sleeping your way to the top. The going rates?

In descending order, these are the prices paid at the latest "charity" auction of "intern" slots, helpfully listed by Michael Calderone. Start saving now, poors.

  • Vogue: $42,500
  • HuffPo: $9,000
  • Vanity Fair: $2,900
  • Esquire: $1,000
  • Black Enterprise: $550
  • Niche Media: $500 [and that's a company for rich folks!]
  • Gawker Media: One bag CornNuts—Ranch or closest available flavor.

Live the dream!