Aaron Sorkin is rumored to be circling a movie adaptation of The Politician, former John Edwards aide Andrew Young's tell-all book about his sleazy former boss (and his sex tape). But who should play Edwards, his mistress and wife?

It depends, we think, on the writer and director:

Aaron Sorkin: If the rumors are true, we'd like to see Edwards played by Tom Cruise, who can channel his years of experience as a good looking man with shiny hair and a slightly creepy demeanour to good effect. Annette Bening does put-upon wife dealing with her own issues better, and glossier, than anyone. Rielle Hunter, is a tougher call. Meg Ryan looks right, but is too likeable. Felicity Huffman is ideal, but not ditzy enough.

Jerry Bruckheimer: Josh Duhamel plays John Edwards, a man who must save the world by fucking videographers. Megan Fox is Elizabeth, his loyal wife who understands his mission, and sticks with him against the odds, in slow motion, while washing cars. Rielle Hunter is a CGI tank.

Paul Greengrass: Matt Damon plays John Edwards, a politician double-crossed by his government and condemned to run across rooftops and leap through windows for two-and-a-half-hours. Edwards and Hunter, played by Franke Potente, must team up to run around shakily and unravel a conspiracy woven years before by Elizabeth (played by Brendan Gleeson).

Spike Jonze: Gary Coleman plays John Edwards, a politician who is stuck in another man's body. Catherine Keener is Elizabeth, a bored and sardonic wife who, through a quirk of genetics, is actually aging backwards. Rielle Hunter, who holds the key to Edwards' transformation, plays herself.