Well, that's certainly obsessive and gross of this guy, but this is really how you have to do it. To prove that Christian values are a stupid lie you have to show the world what exactly teenage boys and girls are really fucking. I mean thinking, you know, about fucking. Temptation isn't just written in the Bible, it's written in our biology, and the way people wield sexuality in America makes me start thinking in terms of what parts of the Mall a public orgy protest could be held most comfortably.

Anyone who submits their family as some beacon of down-home country stab-me-in-my-fucking-face-please piety has skeletons in the closet. I like seeing them ripped out, even if they're dumb and ugly. So kudos. Destroy the myths of piety and celibacy, because there are two kinds of teenagers: ugly ones and fucking ones. Can someone get started on the Jonas Brothers, by the way?