Neil Strauss Is Now Invincible
Hey ladies, lock up your vaginas, because Neil "The Game" Strauss—last seen telling you how to pull much vagina—is back, with a new book! It's about how pickup artist-authors can survive hurricanes or something.
You see, Neil Strauss was out there just cold chillin with more vagina than one man could humanly handle, when one day Hurricane Katrina hit New Orleans, and Neil was like "Whoa: I totally need to write a book about various 'survival' tips, which maybe could make me some money!" So he got a passport from St. Kitts and moved his assets offshore and learned how to shoot a gun (imagine the indignity of dying by being shot by Neil Strauss) and also how to "can and preserve food." Now his book is coming, and it's all you'll need to survive no matter what happens. Don't go fucking with Neil, unless you're a lady that is!
Look at what happened in Mumbai: The terrorists went after the Americans and the Brits. I don't want something like that to ever happen to me.
Okay! Neil Strauss is like The Learning Annex of authors. Which is why he's much richer than all of us. [The Daily Beast; Pic via]