In lieu of national health insurance coverage, America offers easy access to VitaminWater. If you're ailing, simply drink the proper dye-and-micronutrient-containing beverage, and you're good! But now some liberal "public interest" lawsuit threatens it all:

Some do-gooders are suing Coke for making deceptive statements in VitaminWater marketing:

"The idea that you can improve your immunity by drinking one of these VitaminWater drinks is nonsense," David Schardt, a senior nutritionist for the nonprofit group, said during a conference call with reporters.

Ha yes, you might reasonably argue that the entire premise of VitaminWater—that you could decide to "focus" or "revive" yourself based on your flavor selection—is a huge fraud. But hey, 50 Cent has to eat somehow. [WSJ]