As consumers brave Black Friday amidst a crippling recession, it's comforting to know that our comments of the week have earned their writers a truly priceless present: a Bambi Award from Karl Lagerfeld himself! "I admire you, not only for your snark, but also for your energy," said Lagerfeld. "You are to be reincarnated as the Norse god Loki, or as a muted palette in the Chanel resort collection." Congratulations (we think?) — now, on to the winners:

· DarkKnightShyamalan on How Not to Get Killed Outside the Scientology Celebrity Centre: A Primer: Which just goes to show that Han Solo was right: hokey religions and ancient weapons are no match for a good blaster at your side.

· academyscreamer on Discuss: Mariah Carey Is A 2008 Oscar Contender: Mariah has always been much more of a Golden Globes kinda contender. Yes, I went there.

· icallthebigonebitey on Alec Baldwin Not Quite Ready For Your Questions About Fatherhood After All: Back in 1987, I TOTALLY thought I saw Alec Baldwin at a toll road Dairy Queen on I-94 near South Bend, Indiana but it turned out it was someone's fuzzy black sweater thrown over a seat. I went into a bathroom stall and tapped my foot as loudly as possible just in case.

· CatherineTrammell on Audrina Patridge Cracking the Books For 'Twilight' Sequel Audition: She's already on a show about vampires who won't die.

· Old No.7 on Roasted Bass The Special Of The Day On 'Dancing' Finale: Some marketing genius needs to have Lance & Clay go on the road together, and call it Oh, My Aiken-Bass Tour.

Congratulations to our winners!