• Paris Hilton either added implants to "her A-cup" breasts or wants to spread gossip that she did so she can sell her stupid "push-up" bra. (Yes, you can click the thumb if you need a closer look. Yes, you will feel dirty. But don't you kinda feel that way already?) [P6]
  • Graydon Carter's wife Anna gave birth to a baby girl, Isabella Rose Carter, who can already get better reservations and invitations than you. [P6]
  • Oppressive Hollywood people will not let Danny Glover make a movie funded by beacon of tolerance Hugo Chavez. [P6]
  • Heath Ledger's daughter Matilda will receive money otherwise destined to the actors who completed Heath Ledger's turn in Terry Gilliam's The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus. Johnny Depp, Jude Law and Colin Farrell are all donating their proceeds from the movie. [Fox]
  • Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt plan to marry on live TV and also wrest the Hills from Lauren Conrad.