Our economy is tanking and our super-wealthy are in trouble because all their money is tied up in poor people's mortgages, or something. But in the rest of the world, there's a whole new generation of oligarchs benefiting from the booming commodities market. One of them, Victor Pinchuk from the Ukraine, is doing something terrible and unheard-of with his billions of dollars—buying status and influence. Amazingly, his deep pocketbooks have even bought him the ear of former President Bill Clinton! That incorruptible public servant hanging out with sketchy billionaires is one thing, but sketchy foreign billionaires? According to the Times, the two men have bonded over "a fondness for blending high policy with kitschy celebrity gatherings." Unmentioned: private jets full of models and coeds? [NYT]