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John McCain is going to love this: in what is apparently an inadvertent attempt to further the "Obama is a celebrity" meme, everyone's favorite slut rehabilitator Tyra Banks has turned up in the pages of next month's Harper's Bazaar, dressed as a Michelle Obama-ish First Lady (complete with a Barack-a-like and First Kid). Forget Tyra's Oprah envy — it's clear now that Ty-Ty has been taking her social-climbing tips from model-turned-First Lady Carla Bruni. Needless to say, the nation is not smiling with its eyes. Says Page Six (which calls the whole shoot "vaguely unsettling"):

Voguing like a supermodel, Tyra pays homage to Michelle Obama and Jackie Kennedy with pearls, slinky black shift and curly flip, draped against a Barack Obama lookalike and smiling at a tyke playing hide-and-seek à la JFK Jr.

Banks confessed that if she were first lady, her Secret Service code name would be "KMFA: Kiss My Fat Ass."

We can see it now: Nigel Barker as VP, Miss Jay as Secretary of the Interior, and Mr. Jay as Tyra's own personal Karl Rove. Sadly for erstwhile Top Model castoff Janice Dickinson, she would be immediately placed on a "do not fly" list, shipped to Gitmo for a special new facial rejuvenation procedure known as "waterboarding."