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Cindy Adams, the sole-surviving specimen of an age when Gossipsaurs ruled the Earth, has scored an interview with theater impresario Eric Falkenstein. He's the man behind the all-star revival of All My Sons soon to hit Broadway, which stars John Lithgow, Dianne Wiest, Patrick Wilson, and, most notably, Tom Cruise's billion-year war bride Katie Holmes. Falkenstein explains how their decision to go with Katie had everything to do with talent, not ticket-sales:

"As for Katie, director Simon McBurney, my casting director and I came up with a list of names. Katie's not really a celebrity type. She's done brilliant work in films like 'Pieces of April' and 'The Ice Storm.' And is perfect for the role.

'Ann' starts as a simple, sweet, average Midwesterner, and by the finale gets up the gumption to stand and confront what's wrong. A natural sweetheart who can sniff out phonies, Katie basically has that exact moral fiber.

"She's represented by a team at CAA who knew me from past productions, so it just took time - about four months - to work out. There were also family issues. She and Tom are committed to keeping the family together, so they have to get an apartment here.

The negotiation would have likely gone far more quickly had her people not been so unwilling to budge on one controversial deal-point: a stipulation that Arthur Miller's script be amended to include two fresh-faced, tazer-equipped chaperones in navy blazers accompanying her character at all times. Luckily, the Sons producers finally acquiesced: Phony-sniffing Ann now makes a brief allusion to them being "her cousins from Tulsa" early in the first act, after which no mention is made again.