Dana Thomas' gig at Portfolio sounds wonderfully cushy. The former Newsweek writer, now European editor at Conde Nast's business title (she asked for the title because it sounded "very grand"), went on a "couple-thousand" shopping spree after she signed her contract, according to the New York Observer. We suspect, however, that Joanne Lipman's extravagant magazine, which is funded to the tune of $100m, will waste more on the forthcoming opus by Jay McInerney.

The novelist, modelizing author of Bright Lights, Big City, was commissioned to explore Art Basel Miami. The belated piece hardly touches on the art market, the only excuse Portfolio has to cover the event. According to our informant, McInerney, who was likely paid more than $30,000, went to a few parties, and dropped a few names in a sloppy account that he bashed out on the plane home. "Can't blame the guy for scamming, but how pathetic that we commissioned it and then ran it."

Bonus quote from the author, who chronicled the excesses of New York nightlife of the 1980s.

We were more interested in having fun and drinking vodkas and snorting cocaine when we could get it and staying up all night. It wasn't very conducive to fact-checking. [Guardian]