How Britney Stole 'Your Mother'
After the chilling lessons of last night's South Park, in which paparazzi and handlers carried on mistreating the surviving bottom-third of Britney Spears's blown off head as if nothing at all was wrong, we thought we'd take this opportunity to instead focus on some of the more exciting and positive things going on in her life. For one, Britney released an album this year! It's called "Blackout," it's available on iTunes, and mark our words when we tell you, this thing is going to pop up on more year-end Top Ten lists than you can shake a stick at. (We wish we were even kidding.) Moving along:
Have you checked out her latest video? It's some mangajapanimation thing, and, like, way cooler than anything Christina Aguilera or Mandy Moore put out this year. (We'd add Mariah Carey to that list, but then she went and put Kenneth the Page and a freaking unicorn in her video, which pretty much trumps everything.) And then there is her much touted cameo on How I Met Your Mother, for which a promotional clip was posted to CBS's website today. Let's count the things right with her performance:
1. Looks pretty.
2. No accent.
3. Remembers lines.
4. Good eye contact.
5. Nice comic pacing.
6. Uses stage direction as mere jumping-off point.
7. Resists rolling eyes while delivering hacky sitcom dialogue paying off some tired recurring joke about star's moustache.
Britney, ladies and gentlemen, is back.