Why, we wondered, is everything so damn slow out on the town? Besides the usual pre-Labor Day vacation whatnots, of course. Page Six clears it up: Nobody's here!

WHERE do the party professionals, the nightclub owners, spend their summer vacations? It was Europe this year. Gramercy Park Hotel's Nur Khan and Pink Elephant's Rocco Ancarolla kicked it up in Croatia. Mark Baker of Lotus and Noah Tepperberg of Marquee were spotted in St. Tropez. Jason Strauss of Tao Las Vegas partied in Sardinia. And Goldbar's Jayma Cardoso sailed along the coasts of Italy and Greece. Staying closer to home, Mike Satsky of Stereo chose St. Barts, and Richie Akiva of Butter went to Brazil.

We never thought we'd say it but, you guys, come back! We miss you!