Alli Sims, Britney Spears' cousin-assistant, got served with papers by Kevin Federline's lawyer for the upcoming custody craziness. How could he want to take Brit-Brit's babies away? She is doing such a good job. [Us]
Old pornographer Joe Francis compares his legal woes to those of Hugh Hefner and Larry Flynt. Yeah. He's a real First Amendment martyr. Also? When Playboy accidentally published images of underage girls, they paid them off, ya cheapskate. [Page Six]
Otto Preminger thought Kim Cattrall was a really bad actress! That is crazy. [Page Six]
She stoops to conquer: Perez Hilton says 'Hills' star Lauren Conrad "is a two-faced [bleep] who pretends to be all sweet and innocent on the outside, but on the inside she is a conniving, manipulative wench." [Gatecrasher]