Andy Dick TV Appearance Refreshingly Bite-Free
Pansexual performance artist Andy Dick seems to be making progress on his well-publicized problems with respecting other people's personal boundaries; while he was forcibly ejected from Jimmy Kimmel Live on Friday night for his insistence on stroking nepotism-enabled Apprentice arbiter Ivanka Trump's thigh (the Greatest, Most Supple Thigh In the World, according to her proud, hyperbole-prone father), at no point did he try to lick her face (or her c—-), bite her hand, or call her a fucking cokewhore for resisting his unwelcome advances. If Dick continues to show such restraint, talk show bookers finally might be able to forgo hiring a taser-wielding "talent handler" for the comedian's future appearances.