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Lest anyone think that highly publicized celebrity trips to Africa to call attention to famine, genocide, or the incredible availability of cheaply procured accessory-orphans don't carry significant risks for socially conscious A-listers, consider the plight of George Clooney following his recent mission to Darfur. Says Page Six:

GEORGE Clooney thought he had malaria after visiting war-torn Darfur last month. Though he checked out OK, he's having a hard time feeling normal again. "George was very thin and exhausted for a time," said a spy. "But he is the consummate professional . . . and never complained." Clooney's "Ocean's 13" castmate Brad Pitt contracted meningitis in Africa with Angelina Jolie last year. A rep for Clooney said, "George does not have malaria, but he felt like he had the effects of it at one point. It was food poisoning from the flight back from Darfur."

In cases like these, it's a publicist's sworn duty to embellish the truth to better serve his client's charitable interests. The rep chose an inopportune time to downgrade Clooney's malady from the noble "malaria contracted from drinking unpotable well water to raise awareness of tainted water supplies in Northern Africa" to "three hours of light vomiting following the ingestion of some undercooked airline filet mignon," undermining the import of the actor's entire trip.