Johnny Depp Named Best At Faking Enjoying Signing Autographs
The autograph has endured for centuries as the classic celebrity-fan interaction, a masterpiece of social synthesis in which all that is required of the participants is a writing instrument, a writing surface, and a brief traversal of the vast chasm of status that separates a famous person from his or her plebe admirer. Autograph Collector, the magazine devoted to such pursuits, has released a list of best and worst celebrity signers. Sitting atop is the approachable Johnny Depp, reportedly always at the ready with a smile and a Sharpie with which to personalize your Pirates of the Caribbean lunchbox:
"Many stars become bad signers once fame and fortune hits, but not Depp. He's even signed autographs for crowds at the airport while carrying luggage," said Steve Cyrkin, editor and publisher of the Santa Ana, Calif.-based magazine.
As for [George] Clooney, "he'll joke as he signs, and make fun of how he looks in photos he's handed to autograph," Cyrkin said. [...]
"Cameron Diaz may be a talented actress, but she's persistently a terrible signer. Instead of just turning down a person's autograph request, she'll lecture them about how dumb autographs are," Cyrkin said.
Naturally, Diaz isn't so cold as to have people walk away empty-handed. After completing her mini-lecture, "Autographs: Satan's Binding Contract," the actress then leaves her newly enlightened audience with a pamphlet outlining its major points and illustrated with graphic, full-color photographs of overzealous fans killed in autograph seeking accidents.
