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• Assuming a net worth of $1.3 billion, and spotting him a generous five inches to start with, Mark Cuban's penis is fifteen inches long. [Page Six]
• Speaking of penises, Charlie Sheen may have been spending quality time with Las Vegas transvestite Kayle Coxx. The extra "x" is for how super creeped out we are by this story. [R&M]
• Staying on the topic of dicks, former NYT executive editor Howell Raines is living in Pennsylvania and working on a civil war novel in which Robert E. Lee explains how the war was everyone's fault but his own. [Lowdown]
• Suge Knight is down to his last eleven dollars. Apparently dangling Vanilla Ice out of a window doesn't produce as much loose change as it used to. [Daily Dish]
• If a stroke hadn't felled Jay Presson Allen, Liz Smith would have killed her with Vioxx. [Liz Smith]