Supreme Court Dignifies Anna Nicole's Existence
The Supreme Court ruled today that teetering widow Anna Nicole Smith could pursue millions from the oil fortune of her late husband, J. Howard Marshall II. As a 26-year-old stripper, Smith married Marshall in 1994 when he was 89-years-old. Marshall died a year later, and Smith claimed he had promised her half of his $1.6 billion estate. Naturally, Marshall's family took issue, and the two sides have been entrenched in court ever since.
Until now, Smith has not collected any of her inheritance, surviving solely on the meager pennies of her reality show, TrimSpa contract, and National Enquirer "column." When Smith sobers up and her mind begins to toy with lucidity, she'll realize that her perseverence has been justly rewarded. Hers is a hard-won victory for earnest, gold-digging whores everywhere.
