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The Honolulu Star Bulletin was on hand at yesterday's sentencing of repeat offender Michelle "The Drunk and The Furious" Rodriguez, who opted for a five-day prison sentence (she has four days left to serve) over 240 hours of community service. The report notes several bizarre comments made by the actress, including a plea for leniency on the grounds that she only got her driver's license seven years earlier for a "car racing movie" and that all of her driving experience "started and was acquired from car racing school." Even stranger was her explanation of her wild belligerence upon her arrest, during which she dared the cops to "put a gun to my head and shoot me!":

During the Dec. 1 arrest on Kalanianaole Highway, Rodriguez screamed and yelled at officers. She had to be carried into the Kailua police station because she sat down in the station garage and refused to stand up, according to a police source.

In court, Rodriguez apologized for her behavior but also blamed it on steroid injections she had been taking twice a month to treat allergies to "dust and cockroach resin" which began when she arrived in Hawaii last year. She said the effects of the steroids made her "manic," kept her up late at night and caused her to have "menstrual cycles three times" a month.

We had no idea there were allergy medications so powerful their side effects could cause Jet Ski-powered rides along the crimson tide. And yet despite her serious immune reaction to Hawaiian cockroach droppings, why are we left with the sense that the only insect responsible for Rodriguez's cantankerous behavior was the worm that slid down her throat after she polished off a 64-ounce bottle of premium tequila?