The Fabulous Life of Alex Kuczynski: I Saw Something Nasty In The Woodshed Edition
Ah, to be Alex Kuczynski: the house in the mountains, the great rack, the ability to use phrases like "drinking yourself stinko" without embarrassment. But all may not be well in the world of Special K. This week, she jets off to Vegas "at the urging of friends" to catch a Stones show (cue the anecdote about her encounter with Keith Richards). While there, of course, she gets a little shopping done. After hitting up the oxygen bar, as you do, she wanders over to Victoria's Secret where she discovers
the all-black room at one side of the store, behind an explicitly nondiscreet black satin sash that reads, in sequins, "For Adults Only." Inside, gaggles of customers circulate in the darkness, fondling cupless bras ($88) and crotchless panties ($68) and giggling self-consciously. There are pink paddles, meant (I assume) for gentle spanking, and sequined pasties ($18).
So far, so typical. But the piece ends:
In a strange way this Victoria's Secret store, which is presumably racier and more sexually explicit than any other in the country, is the most family-friendly. There is a boutique where Mom can buy her bras and silk pajamas, another where little sister can equip herself with T-shirts and cotton pants, and yet another where Dad can be secretly titillated.
It all makes sense now. Alex, we love you, but shopping is not therapy. Get help.
