Mr. Blackwell's List Takes A Turn For The Senile
Yes, Mr. Blackwell and his "Worst Dressed" list have become the somewhat derided butt of many a joke for all of us living in our savvy, internetsy culture. But let us give the fellow his due! His annual what-once-passed-for-catty proclamations of the stunningly obvious, now in their 46th year ("Claudette Colbert? More like Clueless Colbert!"), have trailblazed a path for the Steven Cojocarus of the world, and for this, well, we acknowledge and quickly move on. But enough preamble: To the winners' circle! Number one with a zingy bullet was "over the hill Lolita" Britney Spears, followed by Mary-Kate Olsen ("Bag lady rags?!" As if!), and recent divorcee Jessica Simpson, whom, he writes, "resembles a cut-rate Rapunzel slingin' hash in a Vegas diner." This last description at first left us confused, then somewhat depressed when we realized that Mr. Blackwell is suffering from advanced geriatric dimentia. By the time we had made it to his description of Renee Zellweger looking like "a painted pumpkin on a pogo stick," much of the pleasure had been drained out of the entire proceeding. Yes, we love an occasional slice of sassy, but not when it's served between two pieces of crazy, rambling, old-people bread.
